Friday!!
The worst of the snow is behind us and Scotland is slowly starting to get back to normal.
As a result I was back at my desk in work with a merry gleam in my eye today. Questions raced through my head. What challenges awaited me? Would I be able to pretend enough in my job to look as though I cared? Had I masturbated in the shower? (Oh wait, I know the answer to that one.)
Everyone else was as pleased to be back as I was by the looks of the downtrodden faces coming in the door. I was quite happy though. A couple of days working from home and I felt like a new man.
As a result every time someone spoke to me I was spectacularly cheery/cheeky in my response.
In through the door walked an older lady colleague I am quite friendly with, shaking her trouser legs.
Ooo, that bloody snow, look at me, I'm soaking!
My my missus, you might want to keep that to yourself.
Said I, tapping my nose.
She made a scrooking noise followed by a tutting.
I chortled at my own astounding wit.
Later in the kitchen whilst I was making a coffee, a mousey Software developer came in and started babbling about Java blah blah and persistence blah blah Java blah blah blah.
After almost a full minute of him boring me out of my chump, probably because I knew little of the Persistence he was talking about. I couldn't stop my errant mouth from spouting.
You know what is persistent, JavaMan?
Umm, what?
You and your Java shite. This is the kitchen. No work talk, ever.
He sulkily pulled his tea bag out from his horrifyingly stained mug and left grumbling something about people being too big for their boots.
Back at my desk the chat around me seemed to be focused back on the snow which had started again with a vengeance. Someone came staggering through the door like an arctic explorer, their furry hat and scarf caked in icy wet stuff.
Looks like someone threw a snowball right in your face!
Hooted one of my wittier colleagues.
Yeah!! From their PENIS!
I yelled.
Everything went a bit quiet. The snow clad person shook their snowy head and removed their hat.
It was El Jefe. He did not look amused.
In fact he looked very, very angry. Coincidentally, that made him look like a baby struggling to fart.
He took a couple of steps toward me.
Oh oh, it looked like I might be for it.
Aye, an elephants penis!
Shouted some wag from further back in the office.
El Jefe made a strangled noise like a dolphin having it's ronson fiddled with and sulkily stamped off. As he receded into the distance I heard him grumble to someone about respect in the workplace.
Ah, I love Fridays!
Fridays are the best. Cheers!
They are, Cheers!!
Ah yes, work definitely is much easier when you have a couple days off and know you're about to have a couple more days off.
All that java talk has made me thirsty for a warm caffeinated beverage though (you'd think elephant's penises would put me off, but nope, I refuse to associate coffee cream with other cream)
I too refuse to associate coffee cream with any other kind! Besides elephants are do intractable at times you wouldn't want to get a taste for it ;0D
Hehe, I was/am ridiculously cheery today. I feel like I have had a holiday lol
Hurray for the wag from further back in the office!
(I do a great elephant 'trumpet', ooh, wish I'd been there ;0)
I was most grateful. it took the heat largely away from me! I would love to hear said trumpet!! hehe
possibly I could record it and put it on dtube...lol...i'd need to have much wine of course ;0)
Ah sweet wine does lubricate that kind of thing! Says me, half gished on the red lol
don't egg me on...have had half a bottle already...only 7:15pm my time
Haha, I love the post it! Splendid, you are just getting started and I am winding up!! Enjoy your night m'dear!
I guess you are a strange and unique person, your post is like forcing me to follow the next post. I think Indonesia should have a freak like you, so that more people are laughing. 😂
Well I guess they shoud!
haha He really doesn't have any people skills or a sense of humour does he xD Well, the snow has finally made it's way south to Nottingham! :D I am off out today to make snowmen, snow angels and dig my bulldogs out if they find themselves in too deep! hehe
Ah the glorious snow! It has not gone away here, Everytime it looks to be done it comes back. Enjoy!
Ah, the joys of Rank Has Its Privileges.
The lower class have to get in early so El Jefe can do the big., late entrance, only to have it stuffed up by a bit of snow.
What a shame,
No sense of humour that man, He would go far with one! hehe
We have a "Comunity Patrol" set up in our small town, two volunteers climb into an old Kia Rio, that has seats that are well past their use by date, and drive around the town looking for potential trouble, we have a radio on the police band and can tell them of anything we see.
They came down to the Festival, rubbernecking and drinking free coffee, and parked the Rio alongside an almost new Mercedes 2 seater ragtop, I went over to the boss of the patrol and suggested we move our sponsor's signage from our heap of S*** to the
Bright Red Mercedes, I thought it would be a far better patrol car, [anything would].
Like El Jefe's sense of humour, he said no, because it was the wrong colour, all patrol cars had to become white cars only, so this one was no good.
The worst of the snow is behind us and Scotland is slowly starting to get back to normalnow that is a good news and time to go to gentleman´s club without stress. I wsh you a blessed weekend.
Have a good weekend too mate! Sorry I just seen this! :O)
Saturday :-)! It is not fair the Scots have snow and we in Munich are hardly get any white landscape - it snowed today but too warm for it to stay.
Oh you are lucky. It's great at first then it's a pain in the arse!
I know but I like it - we had winter my car was not accessible for three months as of snow on, in front and behind the vehicle. Was awesome
Lol, 3 months is quite spectacular. I would like it if it didnt get all slushy and wet!!
if you continue to misbehave, your boss will grab it against you ;)
I better hope for a lady boss then!
You are absolutely giddy today Mr. Boom! So happy not to be working from home, are we? Looking forward to two more days off, but not needing to work...the best! Beer Saturday is almost upon us. What do you have in store this week, Mr. Boom?
I have some fine beers for tonight!! I delicious looking Viking number I cant wait to try and perhsp a raspberry sour or wheat beer. Ihave a few but only choose two to review at a time! It is looking good though!