How do We Cope with Loss and Failures in Life
Loss and disappointments are an inevitable part of life, and dealing with these emotions can be challenging. A person uses different strategies to cope with such difficult experiences. Rationalizing is one of these strategies.
Rationalization aims to relieve the emotional burden of a situation by explaining it logically or making sense of it 1 . It can sometimes be difficult to manage our emotional reactions to loss and disappointment, but by rationalizing, we can approach events with a calmer, more objective perspective. This can both ease the pain and help us move forward.
Rationalization is a person's attempt to explain an emotional or challenging situation with logical or acceptable reasons.
It is seen as a type of psychological defense mechanism , allowing the person to put forward reasons that will make the situation seem more reasonable and acceptable to themselves or others, rather than confronting the real reasons 1 .
Failure in Exams: When a student gets a bad grade, he may ignore the real reasons for his failure (not enough studying, lack of concentration) by saying, "The exam wasn't fair anyway, the teacher asked difficult questions."
Relationship Problems: When a person's relationship ends, they may say, "We were too busy anyway, there was no harmony between us," ignoring the lack of an emotional connection or the mutual problems.
Job Loss: When an employee is laid off, they may try to ease the disappointment of losing their job by saying, "That job wasn't for me anyway. Other opportunities will come along."
Unhealthy Eating: When a person eats too much junk food, they may rationalize the unhealthy eating by saying, "I was so stressed today, I deserved it."
Rejection: The person whose romantic proposal is turned down can ease the emotional pain of rejection by saying, "That person was so arrogant anyway, it's a good thing it didn't happen."
One of the greatest benefits of rationalization is that it lightens a person’s emotional burden. When a frustrated person finds logical explanations for their situation, they can feel more empowered. However, it can also lead to the person glossing over their own emotional processes.
Rationalization is a common strategy for coping with challenging situations, but it has some downsides. First, it can delay emotional healing by preventing a person from facing the truth.
Repressed emotions can become a greater burden over time, while rationalization also makes it harder for an individual to question their own mistakes. This can hinder personal growth and lead to communication problems in relationships.
It can also create mental stress and increase stress levels. While it may provide momentary relief, rationalization is often not a long-term solution, which is why emotional confrontation and the ability to cope with the truth are important.
Of course, rationalization does not always have a negative effect. When used correctly, it can provide individuals with the opportunity to evaluate events from a broader perspective.
However, it is also important to use this mechanism in moderation and to accept the truth. In the emotional healing process, facing real feelings offers a long-term solution.
In conclusion, rationalization can be a powerful defense mechanism when dealing with loss and disappointment. However, knowing the limits of this strategy and facing our emotions is essential for a healthy healing process.
Trying to understand our emotions while rationalizing our losses and disappointments will make us stronger on our journey through life.