Why do people gossip and why it's not always a bad thing

Each of us sometimes impulsively engage in gossiping, it comes naturally, usually without forethought. Did you ever caught yourself saying bad things about your friends, relatives of colleagues instead of concentrating on our own things? Did you felt guilty? Most of you will say yes and consider yourself as bad people. Well you are not doing a good thing for sure, but we should also understand that gossip is a natural thing in human nature and it might be even helpful when it comes to finding a common language with another person, getting to know somebody or... maybe even finding out your own insecurities?

Nobody wants to look like they are worse than other people so they try to soothe or hide their own insecurities and try to bring those, who seem superior, to a lower level. What's the most beautiful thing about this is that it can help us to recognize our own unmet needs as usually it has nothing to do with people we are talking about. Next time you notice yourself gossiping about someone, take a moment or two to think what is the real problem which bothers you, accept your darker side and acknowledge it. What are you jealous of? Are you insecure about something? After finding that out, try working on it and get closer to being the person you are striving to be.

Of course, sometimes the reason of gossiping is way simpler. We want to belong somewhere, feel like a part of the group, we crave for human connection and intimacy and sometimes just simply want to build social bonds as gossip rise interest in almost everyone. That's why some of the bestsellers are biography books which give you a closer view to other people's lives. However, those books teach you some life lessons and not just spread sensitive information about personality so it would be much more useful to change the subject if you don't feel that the things and stories you hear are beneficial for you or others. Don't risk loosing a person who trusts you to feel good for the moment. Trust is hard to build and easy to destroy.