Feelings - HTHT | Chapter 1

We all go through some difficult situations sometimes and I really wished that I had some help beside all this pain. Luckily I found someone a few years ago who helped me being motivated and strong enough to withstand this kind of situations! For everyone who is new to my blog - here is an introduction of what this series is all about. 

This first chapter will be all about MISSING. It could be the worst pain you ever felt before but also a great motivation at the same time. There are different levels of missing a person who is special to you. For example when you will never be close or with this person again, when you wont be able to see each other for months, when someone passed away and a lot more. I know that my tips wont work for everybody but I feel the need to show you some ways that helped me and still do. But before we start, please make sure to be open for new techniques, dont judge before you didnt try it out and put all other stuff by side that you are doing right now because you wont be able to change anything if you dont put all your attention in it!

I am not a professional psychiatrist or psychologist. As I already told you above, I want to show you some techniques that helped me to handle the pain. 

Let me start with the situation of being apart from a special person that you really love for months. 

First you need to accept the distance between you and this special person. Realize that some one is pursuing a dream, job or even a hobby and the distance is maybe an essential. If the distance is just for a limit time, you will know that this hard time will come to an end. Ask yourself these following questions :

How will we stay in touch?

How long will this person be gone for ?

Nowadays we have so many possibilities to stay in touch with each other. Facetime, Skype, Social Media in general, Smartphones, cameras, calls and so on. You wont be able to feel this person or to sense his/her aura but you can talk or see this individual at any time as long as you both have wifi or phone reception. My best ways to go through that pain with a clear mind is to make a plan with a lot of activities. In my case I love to work on my skills, being a better person from day to day and surprise the loved one with the best version of myself. I have enough time to go to the gym, read a lot of books and make great plans for the future when I´m reunited with the person I miss so bad. It wont help any of you if you stay at home, cry in your bed and make each other sad. Distance is just for a limited of time and make the best of it no matter how hard it is! But its still important to stay in touch!  Listening to the voice of the person you adore will calm you down and reduce the pain. Regular updates will make you feel that you are still a part of his/her life. I believe that if you support the person that you are missing, it will weld you guys together. 

In French, you don’t really say “I miss you”, you say “Tu me manques” which means “You are missing from me”.

Now I want to talk about the situation when you and the special person go distinct ways

It´s never easy to let someone go. Especially when you spent a lot of time with each other and had plans for the future. I personally never had the feeling of letting someone go that I loved so hard which hopefully never happen. But it happen to many people and here are some ways how to overwhelm the pain. 

I want you to  think why it happen that you guys go different ways now. Did you have a conflict with each other? Did someone betray each other? Doesnt he/she love you anymore? Try to find an answer first before you start crying. Analyze the situation and try to handle it with my following tips. Make sure to search for a conversation before you leave each other. There is always something to talk about especially when you spent a lot of time together and showed love. Dont be stubborn and hear to what the person is trying to tell you. Take the criticism and work on it, maybe there is a way to get back together if both find ways to deal with the problem. Its always good to know why it happened how it happened. I believe your soul needs the knowledge to go on and be happy again. Ask yourself the following questions :

Why am I in this situation?

How will both be happy?

“That’s the worst way to miss somebody. When they’re right beside you and you miss them anyway.”
― Pittacus Lore, I Am Number Four

If someone passed away...

This might be the worst feeling I could ever imagine. Having some one you loved passed away is nothing you can deal with by nature. It is something you can´t postpone or talk about later. This stroke of fate happens when you least expect it. I dont have the perfect way to deal with it because I can not imagine the pain people go through. I only have some tips that might be useful ... I am a believer but not in a religious way, so some readers may wont agree with some of my hints but thats completely okay. 

The whole world can become the enemy when you lose what you love.
—Kristina McMorris

--------------------------------------------------

As I told you above, there are different levels of missing and different connections with people you are missing. But we are all stuck in the same situation and we want to make the best out of it. Staying at home, crying in bed wont help any of you. There is so much to love and be grateful for! To live means to love. I know its hard sometimes and also a soldier went through some hard conditions but you will grow if you master it!

You were given this life because you are strong enough to live it. - Unknown

Of course I want to mention that everybody needs to find his/her own way how to handle the pain. The mentioned ways wont work for everybody! Its important to be comfortable in what you are doing. If I couldnt decide, I always hear what my heart is saying. It maybe sounds a little strange or awkward but its still true. My heart always tells me what to do when I´m in difficult situations even if my mind tells me differently. 

Do what you love and stop thinking positive !

Thanks for reading 

Stay focused

Love, Soldier