When Nostalgia Gets Harsh

in #life7 years ago

There was a fairly brief period of time around the age of 17 I started getting these strange feelings of warmth from glossing over my old collection made up Genesis and PS1 games. I was always fond of them for the enjoyment they brought to me growing up, but this was a new feeling. Something that I couldn't really put into words because it almost seemed like I would be over praising these things. It wasn't like I played them anymore, but for some reason I was felt at comfort reminiscing over the days when they were new and fresh experiences to me.

It was shortly thereafter I found this newfound emotion to be called "nostalgia". While I was familiar with the word, I had always assumed it was something older people experienced. Like grandparents sitting on a rocking chair staring out into the yard and remembering their more youthful days, not someone who was still going through their junior year of high school.

I started diving deeper into it, digging through old gaming magazines and looking up videos of gameplay with little commentaries in the background. It started to spread to other forms of media. It wasn't before too long I was re-watching old Nickelodeon and Cartoon Network shows. I had become obsessed. It was like almost chasing a high, going from one show to another. I had even learned there was way more depth and some darker adult humor sprinkled in a few of them. Some more subtle, like Animaniacs, while others, like Ren & Stimpy... not so much. It was no wonder my mother didn't mind watching some of them with me.

Being born in 1991, but having two uncles as well as cousins who's childhoods and teen years were spent primarily in either most of the 80's and/or early 90's, I had been exposed to quite a few things that would normally have been before my time from those eras. One of those things being The Goonies. Oh man, did I love that movie, it always had set my imagination off and made me want to go cave dwelling and treasure seeking. I HAD to rewatch this thing and relive these experiences. I eventually got a hold of a copy of by sailing the high seas of the internet.

I got all settled in, snacks crowding my sitting area and lights turned off. I was ready to get the sensation of being a little kid in a mountain of blankets and eating gummy snacks. This was gonna be some PEAK nostalgia for me. But... by the time the credits had rolled, I felt underwhelmed. Why was it movies like ET and Back to the Future aged well, but this one didn't? It wasn't that I disliked it, it just felt... off.

Upon doing some research, I had found out that, while having a cult following and tons of merchandise based on it, the movie actually wasn't that well received at the time. And the 20+ years hadn't been too kind to it. The acting was all over the place and the effects sometimes were jarringly dated. I felt like I had just had a part of my childhood deflated. I guess this was a case of me having viewed something through rose tinted glasses and hyping up in my head as being way cooler than it was in reality.

Over the course of time since then, with me growing as a person and being more aware of political correctness and the general social climate , I had come to realized that, holy shit... so many things from the 80's (and 90's) were god awful. While I can make certain exceptions for some things being more problematic because of the lack of knowledge and awareness of the time, there was some things that I could just not tolerate anymore. Watching Weird Science or Sixteen Candles had me noticing the insane amount of racial stereotypes and creepy rape culture in the films. What I use to think were wholesome movies all the sudden became reminders of how truly far we've come in terms of being more inclusive and sensitive with and to other parts of society.

In twisted way, these nostalgia trips had me both reliving the memories of yesteryear, but also learning how much things have changed in media, mostly for the better. While it was disappointing to learn some of my old favorites were actually hellishly dated and offensive in the the worst way possibles, it was also sort of a sign for myself that I have come a long way and more introspective as well. Oh, and upon viewing it again,The Goonies has definitely made a return to it's former glory and 17 year old me was fool for ever once doubting it.

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Experiencing a similar nostalgia for the late 80's / early 90's (and a secret resentment at my mother for selling my old video games in a garage sale), what you said about The Goonies resonates for me in some way with a quote from Brian Eno that may relate to enduring appeal of something as off-the-wall as The Goonies:

"Whatever you now find weird, ugly, uncomfortable and nasty about a new medium will surely become its signature. CD distortion, the jitteriness of digital video, the crap sound of 8-bit - all of these will be cherished and emulated as soon as they can be avoided. It’s the sound of failure: so much modern art is the sound of things going out of control, of a medium pushing to its limits and breaking apart. The distorted guitar sound is the sound of something too loud for the medium supposed to carry it. The blues singer with the cracked voice is the sound of an emotional cry too powerful for the throat that releases it. The excitement of grainy film, of bleached-out black and white, is the excitement of witnessing events too momentous for the medium assigned to record them." - Brian Eno, A Year With Swollen Appendices