#WiseAffirmations

A Proper Grace
Image by @alliski f/1.7 1/120sec ISO-64 #SM-G930V

I am incredibly lucky.

Like most people of my generation, I have a set of #divorced #parents.

My dad did it once and said bump this crazy shit. He didn’t remarry until both of his daughters were married. When he did re-marry, he remained happily married until he became a widower.

My mother married, divorced, remarried, divorced, remarried, divorced, and almost remarried again. Luckily, this last one showed his true colors before they had a chance to go to the court house and finalize everything.

Unlike most people my age, I am #blessed with a set of divorced #grandparents. I mean this in the #sincerest, and most #heartfelt way possible, because this means that I have more grand-mothers than most people.

Birth of Spring
Image by @alliski 2019 f/1.7 1/4624sec ISO-50 SM-G930V

Like my mom, my grandfather was extremely difficult to live with: Or rather, Like father like daughter.

So, my Nanna being the #feminist she is, finally got tired of the #drunknights, trips to the #ER, and the constant necessity of explaining away weird #bruises to her #family and #co-workers. Soon after, my grandpa Jimmy met and #married my Grandma Reda.

Their #marriage lasted 43 years because she is a firm believer in marriage, disdains divorce, and has a lock on that #southern #grace like a boss.

I know that most people of the #Boomer and #Great generations generally don’t see how any good can ever come out of a divorce. The fact that divorce plays an integral part in our society should not be overlooked: Good or bad.

Age and Time
Image by @alliski 2018 f/8 1/200sec ISO-50 Canon EOS Rebel Digital

In my case, Grandma Reda turned out to be my saving Grace.

She has many wise affirmations for life:

• Ugly is ‘cus Ugly does.
• We gotta take the good with the bad
• Flies charm better with honey than they do vinegar
  And my personal favorite:
• Some-things ain’t worth your soul

I have found myself referring back to her #words in times of #crisis and #need many times in my #life. Luckily, she’s still living (as of this post) so I also have the luxury of calling her whenever I want to. There are moments when her voice rings in my head louder than all flights of #anger, #frustration, #anxiety, #fear, #pain, #joy, or #happiness. I hear her voice often because she’s had, and continues to have, a large impact on my life.

For all of her #wisdom and #grace, it is this last one that I agree with the most.

Some things ain’t worth your soul sis.

On Sunday
Image by @alliski 2018 f/16 1/400sec ISO-400 Canon EOS Digital Rebel

This rings so true with me that it’s always in my mind, because it’s simply a fact. When she said it to me as a child it was often around situations when I would lose my #temper, or when I didn’t feel like going to church. She’s a devout Southern Baptist so church attendance is required on Wednesday evenings, and Sunday mornings and evenings. In her house, Sunday dinner is always served in the middle.

Now, when I hear voice say these words to me, or when I hear myself saying them, they often refer to things like:

• Buying shit we don't need
• Working a 9 to 5 soul sucker
• Holding onto toxic relationships
• My husband shaving his beard

Bless this Beard
Image by @alliski 2012 Kodak 200 #NikonEM

I’ve even repeated these wise words to pass along as advice or reminders.

• When my baby brother called last night he was on his way out to a #MemorialDay weekend house party in Palm Springs. I reminded him to use condoms, and not to stick his dick in any kind of crazy – no matter how enticing the wrapping may be.
• My husband went shopping at Wal-Mart recently. This fact is memorable because he so rarely goes to Wal-Mart. We’re minimalists, so we concentrate efforts on maintaining that lifestyle.
  Translation: Don’t buy anything you don’t absolutely need.
• I had to remind myself of these wise words this morning when I got my hands on the squirrel that’s been digging up my garden.

We Have The Lunch
Image by @alliski 2012 Kodak 200 Nikon EM

It’s a fact.

Some things in life are just more important than others. Buying crap we don’t need is one of those luxuries we have that’s really not worth the effort, money, and eventual soul suck.

My husband and I are #minimalists. We adopted the concept of #minimalism as a cohesive unit a few years ago. My breaking point was when I reached for a baking pan in our cabinet, and several other things came tumbling out while the primary target (the baking pan I was reaching for) remained stuck on the shelf.

The stuff that fell out was heavy and breakable. I was #bleeding.

Scott does this thing where he watches an episode of #Hoarders and will then be in the mood to clean. Usually, he focuses on just his stuff, and most often he ends up cleaning out one of his underwear, sock, or shirt drawers.

On this occasion, I’d just finished patching myself up from the kitchen cabinet avalanche, and we decided that stockpiling crap just ain’t worth our souls.

The Foot of the Rainbow
Image by @alliski 2018 f/11 1/250sec ISO-400 Caonon EOS Rebel Digital

So, we got some boxes together, filled the up, and drove them to the donation center. I got rid of half of my kitchen in one fell swoop. I haven’t looked back since. In fact, whenever I find myself reaching over one thing to get to another, the result is something like Scott watching Hoarders. I end up filling boxes or paper bags of stuff to get rid of.

Currently, I maintain 50 items or less in my seasonal closet. That number includes scarves, hats, belts, and shoes.

Some things just are more trouble than they’re worth. The point of life is to live it. Happily.