Why am I still single/not married?

How come are you still single? I get this question a lot, meaning that why am I still not married?

We all need human interaction; touching, sharing, connecting... This is by far the truth of how we function as humans...

All the books, articles, researches I have read and the discussions I got involved, end up saying; loving yourself is the one best thing you can do to yourself to attract true love / soul mate…And true happiness comes within. Then they also mention we need to let go of desire to have a partner.

There are some ideas also going deeper that we all actually have been with each other in one or another lifetime and we are one being just keep meeting/being with ourselves over and over again in different forms.

So I again found myself liking someone. It doesn’t happen so often anymore. And I always question, is it a real thing or just a chemistry? Am I in love or just a crash? Will it last or end without even starting? Too many questions, right?

But what happens is especially recently, when I have my attention to someone, I see him on my dreams, living us, sharing, connecting in a very real way. Then I get confuse with my waking life. Because the feeling is so real, almost I would expect him to show up in my flat or wash the dishes or cooking. Then I question, which one is my reality? The one I am single or the other state I am in a relationship?

For example, few days ago, I was sitting on my sofa and heard running water from the bathroom. I was so sure that I closed it, therefore I didn’t even go and check. I am very careful about these things. I have bit of OCD, I double check, all the doors, windows, taps all the time! I thought it was coming from a downstairs neighbor. Then sometime passed, still hearing the water running, I went to check and found my sink tap open. It surprised me so much. I had this idea /image that what if in another reality / parallel universe or dimension it was my man washing his face and I just connected with it.

What if all dreams I am having are not actually dreams, I am just visiting other dimensions, experiencing other Asena’s life or get a glimpse of it?

Do we have to believe only what we see, hear and touch? Can we also trust dreams?

So here we come back to our question, why am I still single?

Or am I really?