Before the Light is dim

Light, a bright light that is always around us. Whether it's sunlight, moonlight, or incandescent light. Light is so important to everyone. Because without light, the world will feel dark and there will be no more spirit to continue living! So do I. I live to reach the bright light amidst the glow of the spirit. As if the energy that I am now almost extinct. But, I do not want my spirits to die without meeting him and tell him how much I miss him ...

"How long will you go, Ger?"
I kept asking the same questions in the days leading up to him going to Switzerland for his work. But he did not pay any attention to me. "Come on Ger, tell me" I do not understand why he never answered. I just asked 'how long will he leave me' if I'm wrong asking that question, if I remember that I was his lover.

That day arrived. I think I want to cry in his arms for the last time before leaving me in no time for how long.



"Ger, you seriously do not want to know me when you're back to Indonesia?" I asked again.
"Liona dear, I do not know when I'll be back. But all you need to know is that I love you. I will be back for you. With You .. "
"But, Ger .."
"Liona, the distance is not possible to separate us. And when I get back, I'll marry you the day after "
"You are crazy. How can I be ready? "
"I do not need any preparation from you"
"How can you, Ger. What if when you come back, I turn away? "
"I know you, Liona."

When finished saying that, Gerry hugged me. He also kissed the top of my head in his arms. Somehow, I was so scared at the time.

Day after day, month after month. And continue for almost 3 years. I feel tired. I'm tired of waiting for the uncertain. 'How cruel you are, Gerry. I'm your lover but not a bit you tell me to me directly 'I mumble when the light of dusk has given a beautiful and exotic impression on this beach kuta.

"Liona, come on, you can not go on like this, Li" said a friend of mine, Arin.
"I believe Gerry, Rin"
"How can? Even 3 years since he left you, he never even tried to contact you. Only sheets of letters. You never even know how it sounds when you say the words of the contents of the letter? "He scoffed

Ah yes, Arin did not really like Gerry. So I think saying such a thing is very easy for him.
"Liona .." he called. The tone of despair was clear when he said my name.

As always, I always wait for the arrival of the letter Gerry wrote for me. Usually, there will be a letter in the mailbox in front of my house during the turn of the month on the calendar. But until now, I did not see a letter in there.

My heart is beating faster now. I do not know why. And I decided to stop expecting it ...

"You why this is so, anyway, Liona?" Arin worried. I saw in the corner of her eye there was a speck of clear liquid hanging at the end of her nipple before finally falling from the court.

It's almost four years since Gerry left me. And it's been a year since he has not told me. I'm getting tired. The light of my hopes now faded. But I still leave my longing for her. 'Oh Gerry where are you lately?'

That day the ringing of my mobile broke my thoughts. An anonymous number called me many times. And when I picked it up, it was clear that Gerry's voice on the other side was asking my news. My heart jumped happily to find out that he was going home because his job was done there.

That day, unlike usual. Arin who usually disliked Gerry instantly offered to drive me to pick up Gerry at the airport. "Seriously, Rin you want?" I asked incredulously.
"I just do not want to leave you alone with your circumstances like this, Liona"
"Come on, Rin. I'm fine anyway "

Unusual streets of Bali on a holiday like this is pretty quiet. So speeding up the speed of our vehicle. But I feel my body is getting weaker. And instantly it gets dark !!

"Liona, dear, wake up. It's me, Gerry. I want to see your beautiful eyes ... "I heard the voice I missed. I think my palms are warm and wet now. God, why is my eyes so heavy? I also want to see the brown eyes of God ... restless in my heart.

"It's all because of you, Ger. From the beginning I do not like you approach Liona. And because you did not give Liona the latest year, Liona lost her life. How hard do you give news? Is it there in Switzerland there is no communication tool even the paper you use to write a letter out and nothing left? "

Now I hear the voice of Arin who looks very angry. Oh Rin, why do you have to scold Gerry? I'd rather be angry than Gerry.

Now I give all my energy. I do not want to hear more. I want to turn those who listen to my voice. I collect all the energy left to open my eyes. And finally..

"Gerry .. Arin .." I said weakly.
"Liona !!" they say at once.
"Hey, you're beautiful. Your eyes and face do not change much. It's more beautiful for me "
"Stop poking me, Ger. You have not changed. Still like the old one "I said in a voice that sounded weaker and slower.
"As per my promise, I will marry you tomorrow, Liona"
"Do not you mad, Ger !! See Liona's situation, do you think she can get married in her condition like this? "Arin angrily angrily
"I love him, Rin. I beg you to be a guardian, because Liona only has you "

Arin did not answer Gerry's request. He just looked at me and looked at me in silence. Clear fluid is now dripping from 3 pairs of eyes at this time.
"Gerry, I really do not want to collect your promise. Seeing you are next to me right now, that's enough for me. Enough to eliminate all my longing for four years, Ger. And for Arin, I really squeal you. Thank you for wanting to be with me for almost 6 years we are friends. Thank you for giving me the affection I have not had since I lost all my family. I'm wondering you guys ... "

As I finished the words that were so long, suddenly my breath could not blow and the light began to fade. The one that I will not regret the moment before my light disappears, I have two people who are always singin 'me. Having a man who loves me and a friend that I've considered as a big brother. Now the lights stay biased and run out as the air blows ...

The End