Virgin Debate 2018

"I'm surprised we still have guys who are bent on marrying virgins, in 2018. It's quite pathetic that of all the great things a woman can be in today's world, people still choose to reduce their worth to the state of their hymen. Why is there so much adulation of the hymen by the society in the first place? An ordinary hymen- Yes, an ordinary hymen!

This traditional value in my opinion, has only helped thrive hypocrisy. We now have so many virgins who are experts at oral sex, but haven't just had virginal sex because there is so much deification of the hymen by members of the society. It's silly to think that virginity portrays innocence, stop attaching respect to it. A man that'd respect you would respect you irrespective of your past, a man that'd abuse you, would abuse you irrespective of your past as well; it's not rocket science.

We need to realize that to stay sexually pure is a personal decision and that different people have different ways of reacting to sexual urges. You can abstain till marriage, fine; but that doesn't mean those who can't abstain till marriage are junky. We all feel this thing differently. The sad reality is that many of these guys who're adamant on marrying virgins, are not even chaste themselves. Many of them still uphold the bias view that sex before marriage should only appeal to the male folks alone, as if the females don't have libido.

Just a quick reminder -a virgin doesn't guarantee a good home, a virgin doesn't even guarantee good maternal care for your kids. Virginity is no longer the highest gift a woman can give to her husband, it's not even a gift to me. There are so many virtues that qualify a good spouse, work on yourself and develop these virtues. These virtues are worth more than virginity.

And no, I'm not encouraging promiscuity, no smart girl would have sex with someone she's not emotionally attached to. If you've done it, and it turned out to be a bad decision, you pick up your pieces and move on. I don't just want my future daughter(s) to grow up thinking the day she loses her virginity or the day she gives in to temptation, is the day she loses her worth.

In a nutshell, virginity is over hyped. Sex in itself is not bad, what's bad about sex is with the way it's practised; promiscuity, unprotected sex with multiple sexual partners, and unsafe sexual practices should all be discouraged. I personally do not care if you're a virgin or not, I just want you to be goal driven and complement me with a good character. The moment we get committed to each other, old things are passed away, and all things become new 😁.
I understand we've all made mistakes, you put your past behind you, and then we both build a wonderful relationship."