My views on nudity: before Vs now

virtualgeisha (58)in #nsfw • 8 years ago (edited)

Before I started I was pretty insecure about my body. I also felt uneasy looking at other people's bodies. I didn't really know why, perhaps because I grew up immersed in Asian culture, so where I grew up they didn't even have proper changing rooms, we all got changed in separate cubicles. The first time I was in a changing room in Europe and saw other people get completely naked, I was having a mini dilemma... like "OMG WHAT PEOPLE ARE GETTING COMPLETELY NAKED I SEE BOOBS AND TITS AND WHAT ASDSADAS." I was also really scared to get naked myself, being at the same time so shocked at how everyone else was seeming to do it so casually.

Even when I started posting at first I was quite scared, and felt reassured by the fact that I didn't show face, making myself thus less identifiable. Also it felt disassociated from myself. When people were complimenting me positively, or my posts would climb up onto first place on gonewild subreddits, it always surprised me. People were also complimenting me on aspects of my body I had never appreciated before; my thighs that I always felt were too fat, my tummy that I was trying to get so hard to get rid of, my awkward feet that I felt were ruined due to ballet. Indeed it really propelled me into a totally new way of thinking of myself. I started to criticise my own body less and learnt to see the beauty in other bodies too. Also now I don't even internally flinch at the sight of naked flesh, I have literally been sent thousands of close up, almost gory, dick pics, so anything less than that is like rainbows and glitter to me.

I guess the overall lesson I learnt was that- the biggest criticiser of my body was actually myself. So here's a hug to everyone who feels that they aren't as beautiful/fit/toned/skinny as they should be! I still don't feel it either!