Steemit Open Mic Week 89 by @Luzcypher (Unofficial Entry) - Try Again

in #openmic6 years ago (edited)

This is my unofficial entry to Steemit Open Mic Week 89.

Just wrote a freshly-squeezed song and recorded it as raw as possible in one take on my cell so I don't forget it. Didn't try to polish it at all because I thought I would continue to work on it over time and perhaps record it once its finished this way I can make a post later that would show the process of creating, honing, and producing a song. Please forgive the mistakes and thanks for listening.

Songs are like children. They start out as babies and grow over time. Unless you're a songwriter it's hard to understand that. Most people hear a song once it's completely finished and never hear it in its infancy.

I have a friend who wrote and produced a song performed by Sheryl Crow called Leaving Las Vegas. You may have heard it as it was a big hit. But if you heard what it sounded like when he wrote it you would have never known it could be such a popular song. It sounded like a redneck Bob Dylan sang it with a pinch of tobacco in his mouth. About as shit-kicking, hillbilly as you could get.

That song sat on a shelf until he pulled it out while producing her first album, Tuesday Night Music Club and the rest is history. There were quite a few songs on that album with interesting backstories that perhaps I'll share with you one day.

Anyway, I thought I would make this crude first draft and continue to work and polish the song. I think it will make a good post for musicians to see the process from start to finish. It really is an art.

Hope you enjoy this version for what it is, raw.

Try Again

Verse: Dm / B7 flat / Dm / B7 flat / G7 / B7 flat / F / C / G / B flat

Chorus: F/ C / G / B flat/ C/ F/ C / G / Gm / B flat/ C

Eagle soaring in the sky
how'd you learn to fly like that?
Did it come naturally?
Do you think that you could teach me?

Where'd you get the nerve to jump
or did somebody push you?
Maybe just a little shove is
all I need to get me going
.

Little ant with giant hopes
never doubted for a day
you could move the rubber tree
ten times more than you weigh.

Always looking down on you.
Lessons you could teach me.
Could I borrow half your faith?
It's all I need to know I can.

Jump into the arms of the universe.
Hope it's going to catch me.
If I fall and hit the dirt
how bad you think it's going to hurt?
Pick me up and dust me off,
get back up and try again.

Spider spinning out a web
praying on another meal.
Wind come blow it all away
I know just how you feel
.

Test your virtuosity.
Talk about tenacity.
Build yourself another one
better than before
and if the wind should come again
you can always take up flying.

Jump into the arms of the universe.
Hope it's going to catch me.
If I fall and hit the dirt
how bad you think it's going to hurt?
Pick me up and dust me off,
get back up and try again.


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You've been "caught by the Universe," brother - dusted off and otherwise validated for all your tenacity and musical glory. This is but one small reason why the Open-Mic is what it is... Peace-Out, brother... I fucking LOVE this!

There is something to be said about persistence and consistency. Glad you liked it @passion-ground.

Naw, man... I friggin' loved it... Nothing at all to do with persistence nor consistency - simply all to do with you and your expression here, bro... fucking awesome is the bottom line!

Right on! That was great! Thanks For Playin Open Mic!

Man... I've never told you, and I feel like I should...

You are one of the most positive supportive dudes of our community!!

Thank you for being you...

I notice man.. it might not seem at times, but I notice!

Luz is the man! - ...a "man's man"... and that you can take to the bank! And he doesn't differentiate between the sexes - just in case any snow might be in the forecast... It's all blue sky, brothers and sisters! .x

Aww, shucks. Thanks, @meno.

I like official😂😂😂

Well that was just fuckin’ awesome!⭐️ I realize that’s not the most articulate response, but you’ve got me all pumped and smilin’ big! I’ve only ever seen your face as a pixelated 2-D thumbnail. Hearing and seeing your jolly spirit makes me grin, ear to ear! 😁 Annnd — the song is rad, too — off to a splendid start. I look forward to hearing its evolution. WOOT! 💜

Thanks, @zi[[orah. I love your music. Just realized I missed your show on @meno's Songwriter's Showcase so I'm listening to it now. Love everything about your music.

Thank you, dear! That means a lot coming from you. 💜 Truly — before joining Steemit and discovering the Open Mic community, my music lived in quiet place of ‘once daydreams’ — not so unlike a beloved teddy bear, tucked away with other nostalgic keepsakes; occasionally held with a sense of loss and longing. 🌿 I’m so deeply grateful for the love and kindness you’ve all shown me and my little songletts — you’ve revived my muse and given me a new sense of purpose. 🌺 THANK YOU. 💕 xoxo!

This is awesome Luz!!! BADASS SONG!!!

I hear it all produced in my head already!

I know you have those kinds of ears @meno.

Songwriters and musicians are two different breeds.

I was hanging with Willy Nelson once and he put the fine point on the difference.

Musicians, he said, play songs. Songwriters will play the same song for days, weeks, months, years. Most musicians will get bored playing the same song for more than half an hour. Songwriters can go on and on, trying different things, different keys, beats, tones.

Anyway, you got those ears bro.

Thank you for the compliment brother...

Btw.. I gotta tell you... looks like I've secured the @steembirds for tomorrow's Radio Show...

It should be real fun...

Awesome. I'll definitely be there for that. What time does it start again?

10pm eastern time!

So, what instruments do you hear playing it?

I hear a hammond, a gibson fat tone (think bonamassa), bass and drums....

Hammond is key... give it enough old school and anchor the style down....

@pechichemena
What do you think?

Yup , Old schoolish .. I might include acoustics and electrics ;) . Who knows , it does have a songwriter's touch ! Agree with the hammond if you want to keep it on the school side.. Elec keys might bring it more to ''today''. Bass and drums.. yep.. rock style .. a P-bass and heavy energy hitter !

Btw .. awesome song Luz! I loved it ! I hope to see it finished.. of course.. if you'd like me to help with the production.. count me in !

Rock on Luz!

harmonica solo will be awesome in the last part of the song ;)

That’s what I was just saying about the production!

That's the first time I've heard you play in this format. Very cool tune! It has that kali chorus sound so you've never lost your roots:)

It's the first time I've posted on Open Mic. I guess it does sound Kali-esque.

NICE SONG @luzcypher !!

<3

Sounding pretty sweet man!
Songwriting feels like the hardest thing - it just doesn’t come naturally to me but you got ‘it’.

When you get around to it is there a chance of getting some stems please?

Luz I love your smile it just grabs me from the inside and then I start to smile. contagious !! Absolutely loved hearing you perform mate, funky cool song you kick ass my friend. huge love all day everyday

Hey man, you're really good...! Awesome :-D