RE: Paying Your Dues: An Insidious Concept that Restricts Our Freedom
Oh yes, I'm with you in this. I'm a dad to three young kids, and we're often working on conscious language. Just this week, we discussed the way they were saying, "I worked really hard on this!" as a way of justifying its worth. Specifically, they were talking about some Lego creations. I'm sure they learned these words from us, related to a meal we made, or whatever. Anyway, "I worked really hard on this" does value the energetic investment, but it doesn't really say what's special about the thing. There's no real substance to it. Instead, I'd like to hear the kids say, "I like the way this helps me to imagine," or, "I feel really happy when I play with this." The entire concept of "hard work" is something we aim to improve, just as you're saying here, because "hardness" isn't a sign of the work's value. Yes, and I think conscious language can bring more meaning, more truth, and there is freedom in this.
I'm so glad you related this to conscious language, and the idea of "hard work." The conscious language piece is something I'm working on in my everyday life, and I am finding it to be (coincidentally) really hard! Changing the way we speak to reflect the values we actually hold or wish to hold requires a great deal of vigilance. Paradoxically, "free speech" advocates usually tend to fight against the idea that speech ought to be changed, but in fact, in the long-term it can lead to greater (actual) freedom, in my view at least. In any case, kudos to you for bringing your awareness of all this to your relationship with your kids.
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Thanks - I just looked up @ocd and followed. Looks like a perfect place for newbies like myself :) So should I tag future posts as "ocd," or post directly to the group, or something else?