do you care?

in #peotry5 years ago

People say you have to love yourself before you can love another person,
What people don't understand is how can I love myself when I don't know love, because I'm hurting everybody
Nobody loved me, so maybe I'm just worthless someone ,
Maybe I'm to broken that no one can fix this mistake
Im tired of everyone treating me like I'm nothing
Pushing me away cause they know I'm not like the others
Using me because they know they can get away with it,
Not knowing it's killing me inside as each emotion starts to hit,
I Smile because men aren't suppose to cry,
So I hide my pain so others only see a lie,
People won't see the tears,people won't see the reflexion I see when looking in the mirror!
I'm tired of being good ,
I'm tired of being played like I'm a game of fucking dice,
I'm always getting hurt, face down in the fucking dirt,
Eveyone treating me like a sidewalk, walking all over me, then smiling like it doesn't hurt me
I wish you could see my fucking pain
Everyday wishing you were dead, because living is pointless what do you gain?
How much more can I take until I go fucking insane,
I must love the abuse...
Why else would I allow being use!
Fuck that, you know that ain't fucking true,
But what the fuck can I really do,
I'm a waste of space, honestly somedays I feel invisible to everyone,
I'm hated by most, and loved by none!
Im use to the solitaire, this demon protects me from ever getting with someone!
I'm to fucking clingy, but I just want them to stay,
I have to many fucking faults that why I tend to push everyone away,
I'm hard to fucking love,
No one ever sees that I'm just begging for that special someone above,
Im scared, I'm have cuts all down my skin,
I don't want to die, I just want this pain to fucking end!
I want my smile to be a real smile,
I want this depression gone, I just want one fucking person to stay for awhile,
Make me your future and love me for my past,
Fuck if we fight, don't mean we won't last,
Give each other trust always having each other's backs!
But that's just a dream that's why I'm single cause ever one eventually leaves my ass!
I'm tired of being tired,
Everyday feeling like I'm a piece of shit, so I just keep getting higher,
Drugs are loyal...
There always here when you need them, and they make you feel royal,
They numb the pain enough to laugh,
They erase your memories so you forget your past,
They always put you first, just fucking imagine that!
But staying an addict isn't my style,
Staying high everyday is not fixing shit, it's just setting your promblems more into denial,
Fuck the drugs, fuck this high,
Fuck this pain and how I fucking feel inside,
If only you knew this I felt,
Everyday taking abuse from everyone along with there guilt,
You save yourself just to wash me drown,
You do what ever it takes to break me so you can steal my crown,
You hand me the bullets to this empty gun,
You toss me a razor blade so I can cut my skin thinking I'm fucking having fun,
Don't you know I'm just begging for help,
For that one fucking person to save me from this God forsaken hell,
For someone to stop me from commiting suicide,
Because I may not want to live but I don't want to fucking die,
I just want to take away this pain I fucking feel inside,
For I'd do anything just to feel again alive,
For someone to just teach me how to love,
So I can teach myself that I am enough, for a rose with out pedals is dust,
I know loving me won't be easy, it's going to be fucking tough,
But let me show you I can do this, just promise me you wont give up,
And I'll promise you I'll never run like
For I only want love you can keep this feelings image

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