How Do We Deal With Disappointment?
I speak for myself here, as I cannot begin to understand what others may be going through.
I do however know that we all feel disappointed from time to time.
We may feel that way because things did not go our way, or people did not do what they promised that they would. We set higher standards for ourselves that we become displaced when we do not achieve what we set out to do.
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We hold on to things, ideas, preconceived notions.
We have expectations... and we end up pointing fingers, feeling hurt, forgotten, frustrated. All things that in the moment are valid, because it mattered that much to us.
But how did it help? The pointing the finger? Holding on to that hurt?
We often get over the situation, but when we are disappointed again, it feels like the series of disappointments hits us in one go...
We feel the cuts are deeper? We take on more and push through it..
But do we really deal? Do we approach the feeling of being disappointed differently?
I have heard the saying that we shouldn't blame the the people that disappoint us, we should blame ourselves for expecting too much... I thought to myself, how is that healthy?
What is the point of pointing the finger, when the matter at hand is not resolved?
The chips has fallen, do we cry about it or do we pick them up , and/or move them into positions that would be better suited?
I have been writing many posts concerning self awareness lately, but if we break it down, is that not where it boils down to?
Sometimes we think about a pending situation and think along the lines that - if he doesn't do that , I'm going to ...
And so often its not a plan B, but a plan to make the situation worse, by thinking up ways to make the other person feel the way you do, reciprocating hurt/disappointment...or doing things by ourselves, because we can only rely on ourselves?
Barely thinking about taking the time out, to educate or treat the situation with kindness.
How Do We Deal With Disappointment? I speak for myself here, as I cannot begin to understand what others may be going through.
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I'm learning this too... always respond with kindness and don't play the blame game.
It is so hard too.
Being self aware is a constant battle for me- I have been trying to train myself, but it is a discipline. It has spurred me to get back into Akido again as it somehow opens another dimension in my mind , and allows the transition to constant self awareness to be easier.
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