Peptalk

Another day finding another way
To avoid confronting what I excuse
Don’t want to not talk to him
Tho I find thousands of reasons
Or just one omnipotent excuse
Better then the reward of daring to
Excuse the excuse
For nothing more then what nothing is
Do something stubbornly
not stubbornly do nothing
What a shame i still think about
All those guys from years ago
I always wanted to talk to yet
I never spoke a word or tried to approach
The friendship I desired still
Never happened will never happen
Shameful meditation erases momentarily
My thoughts of making friends
What’s the worst that can happen?
We don’t end up friends
Or is the worse I imagine is we become friends
If so then why pretend I want to be their friend?
When the worst thing the approach can really achieve
Is that nothing happens and we part ways
And the most common possibility is they say “hi” back
Knowing I don’t know where the conversation
Goes and then even more possibilities
Are possible tho I lie to myself
Meditate I do not want
Erase the
No
Don’t
I have to face reality
Make something for once
Stop being a friendship murderhobo
Killing everyone that comes into sight
I’m a sick fuck
Not really
Relax
Over react is what got you into this mindset
Just think of the person
When they are near by
Think of their smile
And say hello
And not goodbye