As Indigo Fades

Some days I scream at my Soul
For choosing to come here.
To save souls that don't wish to be saved -
To drown in a sea
Of endless pleas
As they turn away from extended hands.
I feel myself begging for numbness
To find a poison strong enough
To rid this disease from these veins
Yet I can't seem to find enough.
What's the right dosage?
The right tonic to soothe
These aches?
For my will to remain
Is
Slipping...
My heart is skipping
Erratically with thoughts of you.
I always knew Love
Was a crimson stained field
Of swords and shields
Always willing to rush in
But forgetting what ideals I fight for.
Confused.
Torn between worlds
Lost in a haze of this mirrored labyrinth
As I drop to my knees
In horror of who we've all become.
Are these simply reflections
Of my Harvest?
Have these fruits truly rotted before
They could be saved?

Amethyst