I have everything and I have nothing

All I have are big dreams
but no willpower to reach for it.

All I have are emotions turning into apathy
when I had too much of it.

All I have are my fears that ironically
keep me alive when I wanted to die.

All I have is courage and hopefulness
that still make me wanna quit.

All I have is a strong faith
that makes me doubt everything.

All I have is my mind tricking me that everything is alright
when I'm so close to losing it.

And all I have is myself
whom I refuse to accept and love.

All I have is everything I chose
to count as nothing.