Perfect life

She walked down the road from work without enthusiasm. It was a Monday evening, it had been a very hectic day at work and all she wanted to do was get home, eat dinner and get ready for bed. Though tired, she wanted to walk back home, she didn’t want to board any form of transportation that day. That is how she clears her head. It wasn’t only exhausting physically at work but emotionally too. She wasn’t even sure she would go through the nightly routine of replying chats sent earlier by friends on whatsapp before she falls asleep. Maybe the best she would do is say a thank you prayer to God for protection, provision and continual love towards her before she falls asleep (she wasn’t in the mood to blast in tongues that night). She was not even in the mood to talk to the only person she could never get tired of talking to every hour of the day-her fiancé Samuel. She smiled at the thought of him. He would listen to her, he was a good listener anytime, but no! She wouldn’t share this particular burden with him. Yes burden… the burden brooding in her chest that made the day extra-exhausting. Everyday at work is tiring but today was exceptional.
Not that she doesn’t enjoy her job, at least if not for anything, she was earning a comfortable six figures monthly, which was more than enough to keep up with the recession eating its way into the Nigerian Economy, especially as she didn’t have any added responsibility yet like supporting her family. She was the only female child of her parents and the last child too. So as far as her elder brothers were concerned, they couldn’t ask their baby sister for financial support even if they didn’t have a good source of income, which fortunately was not so for them.
Evidently, the cause of her mood swing was not the exhausting circumstance in her workplace, who wouldn’t be glad to earn such an amount of money just for being a customer service personnel? In fact, having to meet different characteristics of people five days a week (except weeks with public holidays) made her look forward to going to work.

A particular customer who came to patronize the organization where she worked had recognized a colleague of hers, who after she had gathered information from the open discussion that ensued after she had left, happened to be a former departmental course mate of her colleague. After she (the customer) left, that colleague of hers started telling stories of the customer’s lifestyle while in school. “She was very loose” he said, "she slept with every Tom, Dick and Harry”, He continued. He continued blabbing about how she made a mess of her body, he got everyone laughing, making degrading and judgemental remarks about her. Maybe it was not her business because she wasn’t the one being talked about, but she just couldn’t help but feel bad for that customer because it could have been her.
Looking back at her past didn’t she make the same mistakes? It could be that that lady wasn’t that way anymore but who would understand?
People just prefer to hold on to the negative things they know about you. Even if you have repented from your old ways, they’ll not see the good and positive side of you. They just want to continue seeing you that way because they themselves have flaws which they have not being able to overcome, so the best way to live with themselves is to believe that you have flaws too and so you’re not better than them. What a world! Nobody seems to care about how you turned out to be “loose”. Even though she couldn’t continue blaming her parents failed marriage to her past, she knew that if her mother had not been separate from her father when she was 7 years old, there would have been someone around to keep her away from the male neighbour who disfigured her hymen before she knew anything about virginity. What could be worse for a young lady, than not given an opportunity to decide to keep herself chaste till whenever she decides to have sex?
That decision is way too personal for anyone to decide for her, especially when they decide by having the audacity to take it from her in her innocent years. She remembered when her next door neighbour who was also her age mate then, had an uncle staying with their family. He would find a private time with her so he could play with her clitoris with his fingers and make her promise not to tell anyone. It went on for almost two years until he finally penetrated her hymen with his penis. She got used to it that she had been caught many times in the toilet with boys by other boys in her primary school, who would threaten that if she didn’t allow them “do their own”, they would go report to the headmaster. So by the time she got to middle high school, she had been the class whore in every class she found herself. Her father worked hard to make sure she lacked nothing materially and her mother who would have given the basic sex education she needed was nowhere to be found. Her elder brothers were too busy pursuing their own youthful passions to realize what was going on with their baby sister. So she grew up getting enough “less attention” from the appropriate source, plenty material things and lack of vital moral information. A perfect combination to getting her future shattered.
Not until she gained admission into the University and followed a roommate to fellowship one day in her second year, did she realize the gravity of the errors she had made in her life. She can’t forget that sermon, “The Unconditional Lover”. The preacher that day had carefully selected some Characters in the bible like Rahab the Prostitute in Old Testament, Mary the prostitute in the New Testament, the Samarian woman too. These women had a terrible reputation before everyone else, but God chose to save and use them. He didn’t condemn them like everybody did. Especially when Jesus was on earth, He chose to hangout with prostitutes, unlike the men who used them and still judged them. The Preacher took his time to analyse the kind Of Agape love Christ has for Us that never diminishes no matter the mess or condition we find ourselves. That day she had a Personal encounter with God and cried herself to sleep.
Since then she craved for more of God, she wanted to know more of Jesus, She wanted to know more of this kind of Agape Love. Finally the missing pieces of her life was put together and the inexplicable vacuum was filled in her.

It wasn’t easy to overcome the urge to have sex that tormented her afterwards. But as she grew in the word of God, in the knowledge of the Holy Spirit and the grace that was in Christ Jesus, she learnt to build helpful principles that helped her stay away from people or things that would drag her back to square one. She kept mentors that she was answerable to that kept her in check. She broke up with the numerous boyfriends and bed mates she had. It wasn’t easy making most of her former friends believe that she had turned a new leaf. They all laughed her to scorn, whenever she meets up with guys that she had been physically intimate with, there was this smirk on their faces. It wasn’t easy living with that as a Christian but she didn’t give up.
That was seven years ago, Some days like today made her realize how favoured she was, for God to have given her an opportunity to live differently. In fact while in School, she used her story to encourage other ladies who felt like giving up on themselves because of the mess they had made of their bodies. She had graduated on a clean slate and with a new name. She went for her youth service and continued the good works. Now she has a good paying job with a fiancé that loved her like he loved himself. Life turned out beautiful afterwards. God definitely has an eye for broken people. Her mind went back to that customer and wished she’ll have an opportunity to speak with her to know her own story. Had she had an encounter with God yet? Or she was still on the other side?
While she was still engrossed with her own thoughts, she heard a car horn from behind her, she realized that she had almost left the sidewalk and was one the drive way. The driver wound down his glass and said, “ fine girl, abeg no put me for trouble o” she smiled and said she was sorry, “make I drop you” ? "no thank you" she said “ my house is just in front there”. “ok now, take care, no think o, God dey” “ I know” she replied. Then he drove off. On the sticker at the back of the car was written “ He chose me even before I knew Him” … that message spoke to her and that added to the reasons she had to be happy that evening.

All of a sudden peace was released in her spirit, and she then heard her phone ringing, she brought out the phone to receive the call but when she realised who was calling, she just hissed and wanted to end the call because it was the network she was subscribed to that was calling, probably to advertise one of the services she was not interested in, but then, she let it ring because her ring tone was one of her favourite songs she sings, as a constant reminder of God’s love for her and stand with Him –
you are the reason I live,
you’re the one for me,
you’re just the very one for me,
why should I fear
when I have you
surrounded by your love
your everlasting love
why should I care
what people say
when they don’t know
what you mean to me…
She put the song on repeat and was overwhelmed with sudden joy, she was basking in God’s love and that was all that mattered right now, she wanted to scream, shout, cry and laugh all of a sudden. He chose her before she knew Him, what a love ! she wished she could tell every broken person about this love that she was experiencing. It was the least she could do for God after he had given her a second chance to live right and made her story beautiful.

She had nearly reached her doorstep when her neighbours’ children ran into her arms, “ heyyyyy aunty Victoria is back” … It was all she could do not to cry out of joy at that moment. Normally she could have bought some biscuits for them, but that day she had been too engrossed in her thoughts she didn’t remember. She dipped her hand into her bag and gave the eldest child money to buy biscuit for all, himself and the other kids, in excitement they all ran along. There is so much to live for, the happiness on the faces of little children at the mention of biscuit was one of them.
With the new energy she had gotten from the joy from within her, she did her nightly routine happily, she cooked, ate with loud worship playing on the stereo, took her shower and blasted in tongues like never before.
The devil tried to remind her of her past to steal her joy, but God had reminded her that even before she knew Him, He had chosen her as His and even before she made those mistakes he had loved her. He had even turned her mess into a message. By 10pm she was done counselling another young lady from the senior teens department in her church who gets downcasted easily because she had a “faulty” foundation too. So Samuel called her and started talking about how he couldn’t wait for the three months to be over already. He was tired of living alone , He couldn’t wait to marry her… she listened to him smiling and knew her life was perfect.