Leaders Cross
I've been doing this all my life, but I'm beginning to wonder if i was ever even alive.
How did i live so long so fast that life left me even before i thought I had started.
I took a quick turn left and right again and then everything was done.
They told me that a leader was a beacon of light and hope, they never said it meant using up all my light to shine the way for people whose only goal is to see their way and not care how much oil i burn in order to burn and stay on.
They asked me to do better than i ever did before and when that was done they wanted something better than that too until i realized there was no best to this list, it was an endless climb and it ends when i end and they ended me clean.
Very soon I'd be out of sight and out of mind and definitely I'd be out of my mind as I'm just human like the rest of them.
They think if it's easy for them to forget me when i stop, it won't be easy for me to forget me too?
There was a time when I was legend, now I'm barely legend tales, almost myth.
They want to judge me on a standard i set, created from nothing, when they were nothing, now they wish me to be nothing, isn't that some strange something?
kept hitting on me so hard wondering what exact number was my breaking point, now they know and they go about saying they're disappointed I broke, if i didn't have a breaking point, you won't need a number would you?
My only goal was not to let them down, so i held on even when there was nothing more to hold onto.
Broke my back for them that they might stay high, but it was never their wish to see me climb or get high
If i ever did, it made the news that i wasn't as responsible as i seemed, they think it's fine if they should err but i can't even catch some air.
Everything I've worked for so long, longed for so much, marched for to go on, all gone, none lasted long, not one, none, was this everything i worked for? Oh God!?
They want me to walk away without a sound, no clap or stand as i exit this stage, they think I'm old and feeble already, i hear them saying - walk away old man your time's gone now, i didn't even know when the clock started to count and it's done already?
They won't decide how i fade, if this is my end, they won't write it out for me, if i couldn't control how i lived, i would at least determine how i die - if going is all that's left, i would definitely go in style.
Leading now seems like being pushed to test the waters and the mash and when you sink, they say who's next, what happened to them seeing that staying in front was to ensure they knew the way, if they wanted to just push, why not use a stick to guide the way?
I'm beginning to feel the only reason they follow is because there's an altar that needs sacrifice in front and it's easier to set you ablaze and hit you from behind, so they follow - hunters, cannibals, deadly hollows evil folks. I'm done now - eat!
Nice post