Daily Dose of Positivity #10: Your emotions matter

She was born and raised by very strict parents. There are various explanations for her harsh upbringing, some coming from her parents' words, some coming from her own understanding and imagination. Maybe she was brought up like a son, as her parents always wanted to have a son. Maybe her family underwent difficult financial situations like many other families in a war-torn, third world country. Maybe her sister was very sick as a kid, and her sister needed much more love, care and attention than she did. Maybe her mother was too exhausted with her own struggle to make ends meet and live her life to provide her daughter with extra care and indulgence. Maybe it was just the way it was. Maybe it was all her fault: she should have been born a boy; she should have tried harder; she should have been more charming or sweeter. There are tons of "should have been" or "could have been" that can be used to justify whatever happened. But anyhow, she was left to handle her own emotions, to shut up, to accept things the way it was. She remembered when she was a child, sleeping next to her mother, unable to sleep for fear of some imaginative monsters in her head, but she was too scared of her mother to look for any kind of comfort.

Time passed by and she grew up. She thought it was all over, until everything started to come back. You try to ignore your problems, but it is not how to solve them. You can avoid and deny your emotions for some short amount of time, yet the issues remain. In secret, they will eat away your trust, your ability to love, and to forgive. Bad emotions will not just disappear; they will haunt you in various forms: your constant anxiety, bitterness, distrust, ephemeral, fear, and passive aggressiveness. To make it worse, if you are not taught to properly express or manage your feelings, if your burst of tantrums as a kid went unresolved, you will have much more problems as an adult to unlearn your negative emotional expression habits, and learn new strategies to cope with your emotional trouble.

Hence, now, acknowledge your emotions. Your emotions matter and need to be treated with respect and consideration. You are entitled to how you feel, and do not let anybody belittle you for your feelings. It is your life, and you should be able to feel the way you do. Nonetheless, healthy expressions are necessary some time to minimize depression, self-harm and other destructive manifestation. Listen to your emotions and settle them before it gets too late.