Have you ever thought how your responses can influence others?

in #psychology7 years ago (edited)

               

Have you ever been in a situation where you concentrate so hard to complete a task or whatever you are busy with, and then someone interrupts you?  

I am sure we all have! Did you know that when you are interrupted it can take between 23 and 25 minutes to get back to your specific task? Yes, it really takes that long. 

People often think that I am very rude, simply because I ignore their messages until I am done completing my task.  With the amount of work that I have to do in a day, I don't have time to waste, because in my mind, an interruption takes away precious time, and then it will take me longer to complete a task.  

I often overreact to things that happen during my work day, simply because the messages are always "URGENT" and when I finally get to it, I realize that it is a nitty gritty thing that could have waited. Often I react without thinking about the consequences of my words and then it leaves me frustrated because my co-worker is then upset with me, and then I have to sort that out first, before getting back to work. Another waste of time.  

The point that I'm trying to make is not that you should NOT interrupt someone while they are working but rather the way that you react when they do.  

Think about the following scenario:

You couldn't finish a task at work, because you were interrupted too many times, so you took work home to complete because you are working on a deadline. You have not seen your child or your partner much during the day, and spend a few minutes with him or her. Then you feed them, and do your chores etc before you sit down in the most private place in the house.  Ahhh sanity!  You pray for no interruptions, and you are focusing extremely hard to get the job done quickly.  Then your partner or your child walks in to ask you something and then you snap. 

                               

Now say what you want, but it is often necessary to bring work home, our days are just too short for the amount of work we have to complete, and often the people that we love pulls on the shortest end.  

You know the saying of sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me. That is the biggest load of crap that I've heard in my life. 

                            

Psychological damage can not be easily undone!

It is easier to build strong children than to repair a broken man - Frederick Douglass

Often words hurt more than anything else.  Even after intense therapy, wounds may be gone, but scars are still there. As adults we just learn how to deal with things in different ways, we move on, but the scars are just hidden. Any little thing that remotely remind us of that scar can make us feel threatened, and make us react negatively.  

Whenever we are pressured, worried or irritated or even sick, then we react differently than we are calm and relaxed.  Negative reactions can cause physical health issues, like depression and anxiety. This is turn contributes to a weaker immune system. 

Reacting in a negative way can become a habit! 

It is often very difficult to break a habit, but anything is possible.  Here are some suggestions on how to break a habit:

  • Focus on how you react to someone
  • Make a motivational poster for yourself to put up at work. The more you see it the more you will believe it.  
  • Focus on changing your behavior.  Focus! Make a decision to change and then just do it.  

Remember that if you put your mind to something, you would be able to move mountains! 

                             

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My response to my mum's joke earlier today got me in retrospect. I later figured she needed someone to Air out her feelings to. I was too hasty I guess. I responded harshly and bang, she switched off the phone. I learnt listen more deeply and respond more patiently. I think it's very important for everyone to think about how our responses will make people feel especially before we utter them.

words have power and if well used could change the perspective of a person, they have power to influence in a positive or negative, be careful what you say

will thats so true that we get distracted and often we need more time to accomplish what we are doing........i like to ask something i have observed people who are doing multiple tasks and they still focus on one particular task......is this that they get used to? on the other hand you are so true that even i myself get swayed by interruptions...

Very valid points. It is hard in the moment when your frustration and emotions are active to remember to take a breath before you respond, to make sure that you are not being reactionary due to the situation.

I completely agree with the 'sticks & stones' verse. Whoever came up with that had no clue about life and how we all are affected by everything that is going on around us.

words and then it leaves me frustrated

While everyone shouldn't overreact as you mentioned, others have to first respect his need for concentration specially at work, the second thing they shouldn't take his reaction personally because it is not about them.

I have a problem paying attention to something for a long time, and anytime anyone distracts me, it always pisses me off because it'll take 10 times the first effort it took for me to get back to level of concentration again.

As a student, what I struggle with mostly is my mobile phone, and because phone calls will always come in to distract me, whenever I'm preparing for a test, exam or even just studying for the sake of studying, I throw away my simcard and uninstall all my social media apps. Yes, I hate distractions that much!

it is funny how they say that no response is still an response.
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Thanks for blog

nice style like real