What Do You Do for a Living?

in #sarcasm4 years ago (edited)

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I dread this question so much just as I dread all those meaningless chitchats also known as small talks. I guess I was born an introvert or misanthrope for some reason. It is nature, not nurture.

I stole that quote from a movie I recently watched on Netflix. The movie is about this psychopath killing everyone that got in her way. Oops, I didn't mean to scare y'all. I am just a normal person willing to answer normal questions in normal situations. Like uhmm, what do I do for a living?

I beach bum all day every day, how's that?

I remember back in the day when I used to make a living amongst the living, I'd have my lunch somewhere else in the building just to avoid small talks. I am much better at prolonging awkward silences than answering "what time does your shift start?". Oh my Gawd thank Gawd, those were days. Anyway....

So guys, what do you do for a living? Ha ha. I am just kidding. But it is okay if you don't answer. If you are unemployed and getting crazy, no judgments at all. And if you are currently making millions, then good for you. It seems that how much you make is the gauge of how much your worth is in the current system.

I ask what do you do for a living so I can calculate the level of respect to give you. So I can consider if you are worth speaking to. Or if you are worth my precious time, ha! Of course, I am not like that. I'll talk to you regardless if you're a president or a garbage man. Oh wait, I think I stole that quote too.

Can I just say, I dig bitcoins? I'm a bitcoin digger.

We all know that only the most adept social butterfly can survive such small talk situations without a tinge of anxiety. And only they can eagerly answer that dreaded "What do you do for a living?" with all the details.

I do a lot of things these days if you may ask. I read. I blog. I plant. I listen to music the whole day. I overthink. And I talk to you. You guys, aww. I do a lot of things with or without money involved.

Because the verb "do" can mean a lot of things like what do you literally do, at the moment, or in life? But this has been reduced to how you make money. What do you do to bring in resources? Or more subtly, how much do you make? How do you make yourself useful in society? Do you pay taxes or what? Or, are you just living and playing around? Because having a decent profession signifies being part of the middle-class.

What you do evaluates your social capital. And being unemployed bears the mark of the lazy class. That unproductive lifestyle that does not go along with the values of our modern society. How can you keep up with the conversation if you can't relate to normal people? As they talk about cars, and houses, and stuff that you can actually afford by having a proper job. Like a good-paying job.

Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against having a job, after all, this is how we can afford to live in this sick, sad world. My point is that there is no point in asking this question sometimes. I mean, can't you be more creative in initiating small talk? Let's talk about my cat instead.

Okay so to answer that question once and for all, if you want to box me into this quite respectable or socially acceptable person, I do things. Like a lot. I still make money though, not just a lot. And if you want more details, you can probably read my blog from the start, and that's just about it. I enjoy my life currently and living it to the full. I am just using my own standards to determine my own self-worth and success.


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On Mask and Death