We all have Need for a Dependable Friend - Do you have One? Are you One? - A 12 minute read

uyobong (71)in #sc-n • 7 years ago

We all need a friend. We all need a shoulder to lean on. We all need a listening ear to our complains. We all need a heart to sense our troubles and worries. We all need someone who would understand us. We all need someone who will always see the best in us. We all need someone who will travel deserts with us without a complain. We all need a friend.

Who is a Friend?

Simply put, a friend is that one person that sticks more than a brother. In Proverbs 18:24, the writer puts thus:

“One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”

It is amazing and somewhat conflicting to hear these lines in scripture that a friend can actually stick more than a brother when we are used to hearing that "blood is thicker than water". What then is the linkage between two friends that gives such a bond more than that which blood does? Let's look run through this post together so we can establish why this holds true.

The English Standard Version of the Bible translates Proverbs 18: 24 thus:

“A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”

We can see from the above the that emphasis is placed on the plurality of the word, that is, "friends" This shows that we may may have several admirers and praisers. We may have many who rally around us seeming to form our league and company, rather, their contributions may lead us into a path of destruction and regrets. This invariably means that our success does not depend on the number of friends supposedly credited to us.

A large number of friends does not equal help in the time of need.

If it were to count on the number of people who celebrate us, then, celebrities wouldn't be victims of suicide, depression, anxiety and heart attacks since they are have many fans who are supposedly known as their friends.

Many popular celebrities have faced this dilemma—they can have thousands of fans, yet fame is fickle, and the fans quickly disappear during difficult times. Our era of social media promotes many superficial connections who are called “friends,” but there are few true friends. Even the most connected can be lonely.

It therefore mean that the concept of friendship goes beyond being celebrated or "fanned", it may portray a meaning deeper than the literally definition. Further studies in scripture revealed that the word "friend" is used as much as 9 times with different connotations for the word in discourse. We will look at some of them which forms forms a basis for our selection of friends and knowing who truly is a friend. The characteristics as attached to who a friend is are amazing and I hope we'll learn together.

1. A Friend Understands

Say to wisdom, “You are my sister,” And call understanding your intimate friend; (Proverbs 7: 4, New American Standard)

ESV translates understanding as "insight" while CEV translates it as "common sense". This reveals that where there is true friendship, there is understanding, even when words are not uttered. The relative use of Wisdom in that verse shows that a man of wisdom can make a better friend. This is so because he does not make conclusions at a glance, rather, brings in experience and context in judgement and this values are reserved for the matured (note, I didn't say- elderly).
Nugget: The next time you need a friend, go for a man of wisdom.

2. A Friend Loves without Reservations

A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity. (Proverbs 17: 17, New International Version)
A friend is there to help, in any situation, and relatives are born to share our troubles (Proverbs 17: 17, Contemporary English Version)

I deliberately paralleled the CEV translation so we cal learn better. We see how the scripture portrays the love of a brother as being reserved for difficult times? yet a friend is always there. While a may see that we are fine and simply allows us to have our time, friends bug us in trouble, pain, laughter and every time. Hence, the next time you hear somebody say "a friend in need is a friend indeed", you'll have to question it. If you ain't in agreement with me on this, ask yourself why you so nurture your poultry and prevent predators from attacking them, yet, you'll kill them later on for your festivity. A friend in need may play such roles.
Nugget: A friend in need may not always be a friend indeed.

3. A Friend has Something to Give:

Many will seek the favor of a generous man, And every man is a friend to him who gives gifts.
(Proverbs 19: 6, New American Standard Bible)
Many curry favor of an official; everyone is a friend of the gift giver. (Proverbs 19, 6, International Standard Version)

Giving is the most popular characteristic of friendship and love. Friends are obliged to give time, material resources, capital resources, advice, comfort, name them... In essence, friendship cannot be complete without giving. Where you have a supposed friend who cannot give anything, then the relationship is questionable.
Nugget: A friend always have something to offer.

4. A Friend Celebrates with the Wealthy:

Wealth brings many new friends, but a poor man is deserted by his friend. (Proverbs 19: 4, English Standard Version)
Rich people are always finding new friends, but the poor cannot keep the few they have. (Proverbs 19, 4, Good News Translation)

From the above verse, the Good News Translation attaches a deeper meaning. I this case, like poles attract. However, the poor mans seems to have been rich, but makes no effort to sustain or increase his wealth. As such, he will drain out the rich friend. This characteristic looks nearly looks unacceptable. But, there is a way to view it.

When we say wealth, we do not refer to money. God had taken sufficient time to build everyone as recorded in Psalm 139. Yeah, we were made perfectly, beautifully and wonderful for a specific a specific or some specifics of life's endeavours. While, a friend is such who is ready to give, a friend should not get replete in the process. God created us all and commanded us to be fruitful. We all have what it takes to be fruitful. Like @surpassinggoogle will say concerning @steemgigs, "we all have something to offer.

We can only be able to keep a friend when we are conscious of giving our part to ensure mutual sustenance of the relationship.
Nugget: The next time you need a friend, be sure you too have something to offer.

5. A Friend is Sincere and Speaks graciously:

He who loves purity of heart, and whose speech is gracious, will have the king as his friend. (Proverbs 22: 11, English Standard Version)
The king is the friend of all who are sincere and speak with kindness. (Proverbs 22, 11, Contemporary English Version)

Here we see a friend as a person who is sincere, open and pure at heart. He does not hold grudge but rebukes every flaw but with love. A friend is one whose speech are graced and can heal a broken heart. A friend has king words in his vocabulary to encourage his companion. A friend is not timid and not too reserved. A friend knows what to say and when to say what. A friend knows the value of words and is able to choose it rightly.
Nugget: The next time you need a friend, be sure he has a graced vocabulary.

6. A Friend Rebukes and Corrects:

You can trust a friend who corrects you, but kisses from an enemy are nothing but lies.
(Proverbs 27: 6, Contemporary English Version)

Only a friend will be true enough to rebuke your wrong doing and as well correct same. SImilarly, only a friend trusts the rebuke and correction of another. While the adversary seeks for ways to let you fall in your errors, a friend seek ways to help you amend your ways for good.

It is rather sad that many see corrections as coming from an enemy. Note that an enemy does not seek your good and will never, but, a friend will always want a better you. Rebuke and corrections is meant to prune us to be better.
Nugget: The next time you need a friend, seek for who can correct you and would also accept corrections.

7. A Friend gives Good Counsel:

Ointments and perfume encourage the heart; in a similar way, a friend's advice is sweet to the soul.
(Proverbs 27: 9, International Standard Version)

Yeah, the advice from a true friend is likened to perfumes and ointment. It is sweet because they come with the best intentions. Friends can always give us their ears and their advice will be soothing.
Nugget: The next time you need a friend, seek for who gives good counsels.

In summary, the genuine and dependable friend is someone whom ca be trusted and counted upon. We have a friend in Jesus. He cares more than we can ask. He understands, loves us without Reservations, He gives life in abundance, He makes us wealthy, He is gracious. He rebukes and Corrects and He is the wisdom of God.

In Luke 7: 34, Jesus is tagged as a “friend of sinners”. He promised that He'll leave nor forsake us (Heb. 13: 5). Find time to reflect on the lines of this awesome hymn The best friend is Jesus authored by Peter P. Bilhorn

Oh, the best friend to have is Jesus,
When the cares of life upon you roll,
He will heal the wounded heart,
He will strength and grace impart;
Oh, the best friend to have is Jesus.

Chorus:
The best friend to have is Jesus,
The best friend to have is Jesus,
He will help you when you fall,
He will hear you when you call;
Oh, the best friend to have is Jesus.

What a friend I have found in Jesus!
Peace and comfort to my soul He brings;
Leaning on His mighty arm,
I will fear no ill nor harm;
Oh, the best friend to have is Jesus. [Chorus]

Tho' I pass thro' the night of sorrow,
And the chilly waves of Jordan roll,
Never need I shrink nor fear,
For my Saviour is so near;
Oh, the best friend to have is Jesus. [Chorus]

When at last to our home we gather,
With the faithful who have gone before,
We will sing upon the shore,
Praising Him forevermore;
Oh, the best friend to have is Jesus. [Chorus]

Let me take this time to celebrate my friends below. They have greatly been a blessing and impacted my stay in steemit in different ways.

@Steemchurch is created by @Sirknight with a parish in Nigeria as @Sc-n pastored by @Adedoyinwealth. Join Discord HERE. You can also visit https://steemchurch.net

@Stach is created by @Ejemai. Join Discord HERE

@Promo-mentors is created by @Futurethinker. Join Discord HERE

@surpassinggoogle is a steemit witness with witness name "steemgigs" Vote for him here @ulogs @teardrops @steemgigs @steemsecrets @steem-untalented are his creations. Use the steem-based website. Join the Steemgigs Community on discord HERE](https://discord.gg/CGuPyyT)

I am @uyobong from Southern Nigeria, Nigeria.
I am a passionate teacher, motivator, data analyst and creative writer.
I am teachable and do maximize every learning opportunity.

I blog about faith, life success, self-development, purpose discovery and actualization
I promote ideas and people of worthy values.
I blog on what to do to achieve success in steemit with target audience cutting through old and new users.

With my wealth of experience and passion to touch lives, I will put in my expertise in creative writing and data analysis to put up heart-touching and real messages woven with my success and failing stories to encourage steemit users and the outside community to reach stardom. These will be structured to fit in with the goals of promo-mentors.

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