Prime Gamble

I had forgotten my sunglasses at the hotel, so heading west had become an unbearable burden in the desert sunset. The old convertible’s engine was choking and my tank was nearing empty. It was on these types of roads where rednecks usually had aliens abduct and probe them. These things did not weigh in on my mind except for the comedic thought every now and then. With the wind in my hair and with me on my way back home from a long trip for an exam in management, I could not help feel but content and at ease, even though the E on the fuel gauge bugged me. What bothered me more was that the gas station I had seen on my way north wasn’t there anymore. Had I taken a wrong route or was I confusing the stops again? One could say that had road trips been anything like managing, that I would be a colossal failure, but that was a weak comparison in my mind. You can’t plan for everything. You can plan for a tire popping in the middle of nowhere, but few plans have multiple tire failures involved.
That is what happened. Sure, there was one spare and I could call someone for help, but as I sat with my hands on the wheel, I thought mostly about internal bleeding, loss of limb and or life. These things are normal in life threatening situations after all. The car started to turn sideways and it screeched to a halt as I stepped on the brake. That burnt rubber smell hung in the air.
At first I sat there, almost unable to move, arms shaking with my tight grip on the wheel. Maybe it was the heat or a combination of heatstroke and shock. I stepped out of the vehicle to see which tires had popped. Bending over, I saw the dancing road in the distance, I had about half a gallon of water with me, but no food. This was extreme heat even for the desert, but I was not about to give up then and there. My family was not known for quitting.
The left tires had not only popped, but they were almost shredded. There was no way they could be redeemed. So I pulled out my cellphone, knowing that I would not destroy a rim driving on two and a half good tires - a spare tire is only half good. If you guessed that I had no signal I would not be surprised. Yes, I did not have good signal there. It was in the middle of nowhere. I had only hoped in my moment of panic that maybe there was a chance, because of the gas station that obviously moved. That was if I had not missed a turn.
I wondered what Bear Grylls would have done if he were in my situation. I was a city boy and never had enjoyed the “great outdoors” much. Unfortunately, this was no busy road. My shoes were ovens and I had little water left. There was no higher ground, no signal and a little bit of despair building up inside of me. This would probably mean that I would only reach my home late Sunday, with pre Monday blues slow dancing in my mind. I did not even want think about my boss yelling at me.
Not long after kicking a tire and walking around with my cellphone, a car drove by and though I had not had enough time to wave it off, it gave me a glimmer of hope. The road was quiet, but at least there were still people passing through.
I climbed back into the car and leaned the seat back. Staring at the lonely clouds I thought a bit about the exam. Worrying about my situation or my marks would not do me any good. It could make me sweat more if such a thing was possible. I turned on the hazard signals and waited. Perhaps there would be a stranger kind enough to take me to the nearest auto repair shop. I decided to take a sip of water. I figured that it would not make a big difference. I placed my hands beneath my head again and closed my eyes, waiting for anyone to just help me out.
Never in my life did I think that I would be so relaxed in what many would describe as a moderately dangerous experience, but I did and that is why I fell asleep. That sweet sleep was short lived however as I felt that quick jerk that pulled me from a five second dream. It was still unbearably hot, but I thought I had heard something. I stepped out of the car and peered out into the distance.
A trail of dust was coming my way. For some stupid reason I felt the urge to straighten my collar and comb my hair before waving like a maniac. I did all of those things, then stumbled as I exited the car. Someone else would probably have said I was a fitness nut who had discovered the newest fad of doing desert jumping jacks.
“Hey!”
Obviously they could not hear me, but I guess it would have been a good practice run if they had not seen me.
“Hey, I am over here!”
The dust started to engulf the approaching vehicle and was heading my way.
“Pffftt.” I spat the last bit of slime I had in me onto the tar when dust had entered my mouth
At first I would not have said that there was something strange about the man in the truck. He was a bit overweight and wore a blocked shirt, and a big grin.
“Do you come here often?” he asked. Those were his first words.
“Excuse me?” I approached his car.
The guy started laughing a bit before his eyes drooped and from the back of the truck a monkey jumped on top of his head. I could not believe my eyes for one moment. Considering how my day had been going I did not want to laugh at the only stranger that could help me, but I could not help myself.
I burst out laughing. The monkey climbed over the fellow’s shoulder, turned around, with its one paw gripping the shirt and then it slapped him. Of course it made me laugh more. It was then when I started to think that my dehydration was actually a much bigger problem.
“Okay, forgive my friend here, he is just excited,” the man said and put the monkey on the seat next to him. “It seems like you have trouble. Trouble seems to always happen on this road.”
“Yes, two of my tires got ripped. I do not know what caused it and frankly I need your help.”
The monkey pointed at me suddenly and jumped up and down. The man hushed it.
“I can tow your car to a place I know, not too far from here. That is after we get some new tires on this old beauty. I can take you there. It is a little oasis in the desert, but the thing is that you need to give me your water.”
I ignored his strange request.
“I only need new tires and -
“Are you sure young fella?” he asked. He was leaning slightly forward.
It was a strange deal he was offering, but he was my only hope.
“Yeah, like I said, my wheels are shredded.” With this, I opened the door and turned the ignition. I could feel myself blushing.
“The car worked a minute ago. This can’t be happening.”
“Calm down, we can help you out, but I need you to give me-“
“My water?”
“Yes.” The guy grimaced. “Of course you can wait for another car to come by.”
“Forgive me for finding the request strange.”
“No problem. We all have strange requests some time.”
“Funny, you make it sound like I made one. I am William,” I said as I approached his vehicle.

The man did not share his name which bothered me a bit. Perhaps he was not used to human contact and since monkeys do not have time for pleasantries he saw no need to tell me his name. It was that or I was just a fool who took a ride with the weirdest serial killer in the history of serial killers. Hesitantly I handed over my bottle of water and I could not help but feel ashamed at the awkwardness of the exchange.
“William, that is a nice name, don’t you think Boss?” he said.
“The monkey’s name is Boss?”
“No, I am the boss, sorry. He is Chuck.”
The monkey started jumping up and down and screamed as loud as it could in the language only monkeys could understand. It seemed a bit angry at its owner.
“My name is Manny. This is my truck. Do you like it?”
I looked at his truck.
“It seems like I need your help more than I thought.”
“Seem is an interesting word, don’t you think? Never mind that, let me take you back to our place. It is old business we run there. Maybe you can spend the night.”
“Spend the night? No way. I need to be back at my work. I can’t be late again.”
“We will try our best to get your car in driving condition ASAP then.”
I looked at the monkey. I didn’t think that it was fond of me, but I didn’t feel insane enough to ask why it had that scowl on its face. There wasn’t much time to hesitate. I traded my water for a ride and perhaps a place to spend the night. It wasn’t much to give up, but it was weird and needless to say, my mind was full of questions.
The desert passed by. Every now and then the sand would be interrupted by shrubs or a lonely tree. My head rested slightly against the window. The monkey climbed to the backseat. Its tiny paws gripped the seat as it lunged. It landed quite elegantly and afterwards made a slight bow. Then, without a warning… it put its paws underneath one of the seats and produced a doll’s shirt. It started to dress itself.
“Don’t mind Chuck. He is a performer.”
It stuck out its tongue and pointed at me, smirking. I wasn’t fond of monkeys, but it did fascinate me.
A while later Manny turned right into another empty road, but in the distance, and when I squinted I could make out a few palm trees between the heat waves. Luckily it was starting to cool down. Unfortunately I wasn’t dressed for the desert’s night cold either.
“Here we are, pal.”
Expecting a garage, my shock could be imaginable, because when we arrived, there was an old hotel and lots of blinking lights like those from the Vegas Strip. It was quite dazzling. This place was not a pit stop along the way. It was one of those infamous gambling traps. Unlucky leaving winners or incoming wishful gamblers often found themselves in such places. I was not a gambling man though and always laughed at the fools who took risks like that.
When we stopped, a slight breeze was blowing. I still had my sunglasses on. I stretched myself out as I landed on the ground and looked out for other people, but there wasn’t any. It seemed like this place had run its course. There was a small petting zoo that did not quite fit in with the rest of it all. I looked at the biggest neon sign.
Barra de Postre
A smaller one with red letters showed me where the hotel was.
“Hey, are you day dreaming?” Manny snapped his fingers in front of my face. “That’s alright, here dreams do come true.”
“Spare me the salesman’s voice, I am not a gambler. So, is this your place?”
“Yes, in some way it is.”
I did not see the garage.
“The garage is at the back, don’t worry I will let them know where your car is and tell them to fix he right up.”
“You read my mind.”
He punched me on the shoulder. To be honest, it hurt more than a bit.
“You have worry written all over your face.”
I had not realized it myself, but that was because I knew my subconscious mind was at my job. I had to call my boss and let him know that I would not make it. He was not fond of me, but he was a somewhat reasonable man. I reached into my pocket for my phone, but to my horror it was not there.
“I think my phone fell out of my pocket, maybe in your truck.”
Chuck was laughing in its own way. I soon realized why. I looked at the monkey and my phone was sticking out of one of the pockets of its jacket. I couldn’t believe that the monkey was mocking me.
“Manny, your monkey stole my phone.”
“Bad… Chuck. Bad. Give the nice man back the phone.”
My relief was short, because I realized there still was no signal and that the battery was low.
“Is there a phone I can use?”
“Try the hotel, heck I’ll even work in some discount for when you stay.”
“I won’t stay if I don’t have to.”
He stared at me as if he did not hear a word I had just said.
Entering the hotel, I could not help but notice its emptiness. The walls were a little dilapidated and some of the paint was peeling off. My phone made one last buzz to let me know that the battery had died. The receptionist wasn’t even at the counter. Two leather bags stood on a dolly, but there was no bell boy. It was quiet, except for the blowing fan and my footsteps. I rang the bell once, then twice quickly in succession.
“Hello.” I said. My throat was a little dry. “Hello. I just want to use your telephone.”
There was no response, but there was a telephone on the desk. It wasn’t a public phone, but seeing as the desk was unmanned and me being creeped out and with more excuses in my mind I picked it up and dialed my mom’s number. I was ashamed that that was one of two numbers I knew. The other one was I remembered was for a pizza joint. I started tapping my hand on the desk while the phone was ringing. It wasn’t a normal ringing sound either. It had a tune. Almost like the ones you would hear at a circus.
Up to the point my tapping was incessant. For a brief moment I saw a shadow cast over my hand. A cane landed with a thud on my left hand and then on my head. The only rhythm now was the pulsing pain and the far away ringing sound. I had dropped the phone.
“You better not have gotten your ear wax on my phone sonny, scram,” said the voice of an elderly woman.
I turned around slowly, half raising my arms as if I was caught by the police.
“Forgive me, but it was an emergency. May I please use your phone?” I backed away from her dangerous cane.
“Fine, I hope you learned your lesson.”
I sure had. I nodded sheepishly and picked up the phone.
The lady looked at me and made a gesture of a phone not touching my head. I nodded again. This time my mom picked up. I leaned against the wall to my right. My fingers could feel the paint peeling off.
“Hello mom, my car gave me some troubles. I don’t think I will make work tomorrow…”
“Are you okay?”
“Yes, can you please give me my company’s number? I don’t know it.”
“Sure thing, just give me a minute.”
I waited a little while through the awkward glances the old lady gave me. Every once in a while I gave a half smile. Thankfully my mom had returned quickly.
“I found it. Eight hundred. Seven eight. That was seven, eight…”
The lights dimmed a second and flickered again. There was a voltage sag. I sighed heavily.
“What was that sigh all about. You can call again.”
I knew I could, it was just the series of misfortunes I had had that was irritating me.
I picked up the phone again and held it a little bit from my head, but I only heard the dead beep sound. For a second I thought that the line was dead, but it turned out that my luck had changed. So I dialed my mom’s number again and I explained a little more about what was going on. Afterwards I immediately called the office and had a short talk with the boss’s secretary. I would have preferred to have spoken to him directly, but considering the circumstances I was feeling rather pleased with myself. When I put the phone back into its socket, I could see the lady looking intently at it, almost examining if there was any sign of dirt on it and I started to notice a foul smell coming from somewhere inside the building, the very building I would perhaps sleep at that night. Manny entered the building too and nodded politely at the old lady. He approached me with that same old smile on his face.
“Hey, is my car going to be fine?” I asked.
“Yes, in fact I just saw them towing it in”
“I still can’t believe it didn’t start.”
“Tough luck, but don’t worry, this is a nice place to stay.”
It didn’t really look nice to me. The inside was very dusty. I looked at the old lady again.
“Excuse me.”
“What is it this time?” She rolled her eyes at me. Most customers probably weren’t willing customers.
“I would like to spend the night here.”
“And I would like to be my own boss.”
‘Please, what will it cost?”
“Just put your shoes on the counter.”
I liked my shoes almost as much as the idea of paying with money.
“What about dollars? Come on hard earned cash? It can’t be that bad.” I joked, but I felt a little weird about it all.
If you want to sleep here tonight. You must give in your shoes. Hesitantly I untied my shoes and pulled them off slowly. They smelled a bit after the warm day. I put them on the counter top and I started to unbuckle my belt.
“Do you want my pants too or how about my shirt.”
“Don’t be silly dear, I only asked for your shoes. You got the discount.”
I was having a hard time understanding what their problem with money was and what their fascination with stuff like water and shoes were.
“Feel free to go the casino and if you want breakfast tomorrow, it starts at six thirty.”
“Thanks.” I did not mean it.
I buckled my belt again and remembered that I had not taken my luggage from the car. She placed the key on the table.
“Room 201. You have a wonderful stay now at Barra de Postre. Where dreams blah blah.” She sat back and opened the magazine in front of her.
Outside, I walked around the building to where I believe the auto shop would have been. There was a sign that read, gas station. I walked toward it and saw my car. Of course I was not paying attention to the ground, maybe the same way I had not paid enough attention on the road.
I smelt it as soon as I stepped in it.
“Ugh, yuck.” The dung was fresh and I could not tell what kind of animal left that landmine there, but I had no time to curse my luck. I wanted to make sure that my car was fine.
The garage door was more than halfway open. A red neon light flickered on the wall.
“Hello?”
There was no response. I crouched and entered the shop at the sliding door. There my car was, its bonnet was open and it already had new wheels. I heard the sound of a door creaking open.
“Manny?” No response. I turned toward the door near a counter. It was slightly open. I could hear feint footsteps coming my way.
“Chuck?”
The monkey stepped into the light.
“It is you.”
It then placed its hand on top of its face.
“No, I am Manny. What do you think? Of course I am Chuck.”
“What? What kind of parlour trick is this? A talking monkey?” I clapped my hands slowly together. “Well done Manny, you got me. I thought this stupid monkey could talk. You really scared me too, well done.”
“You should be scared.”
The way the voice said that was scary. At this point I was convinced that Manny was talking, but it sounded exactly like it was coming from the monkey’s mouth. The monkey took a step closer.
“I don’t want to deal with this now.”
I opened my car’s trunk and got my bag out. I wondered if it they found the real problem with the engine. I also wondered where the mechanic was.
“I can’t believe you dragged that manure in here. At least wipe your feet, human.”
“Give it up Manny.”
Just then, Chuck jumped on the car from the front end and hurried to the roof. I tried to ignore its antics. I closed the trunk.
“Get off of there you dumb monkey.”
It slid down and sat on top of the trunk.
This time I could see it clearly.
“I am not a Manny, I am not a dumb monkey and this is no trick, you stupid human. This isn’t even somewhere where you want to be.”
My heart started to race. The sound was definitely coming from the monkey. Trying to keep and trying to keep my heart rate down, I asked the monkey a question.
“How is this possible?”
“Vocal cords, human. It is called vocal cords. Must I explain everything to you?”
“Why are you here?”
“That is a better question. I am here to meet the guest of our hotel of course and by guest I mean prisoner.”
I laughed. “Prisoner? I may not have my shoes on, but I can still kick you, you know.”
“Clever human. Kick me. Go ahead. Manny will kill you if you harm me. Although I must admit that I am not fond of killing people... always, I think I may enjoy killing you more”
This could not be happening. I broke into a run and rolled under the door. I had to get out of there.
Animals couldn’t talk. They never had talked before and they never would. The soft footsteps followed me.
I ran faster than my poor body could sustain, faster than I should have been able to run. I passed the field of manure. Above me a swarm of swallows, circled almost in the same way a murder of crows would. I didn’t stare for too long. Manny would have a lot of explaining to do.
I barged through the door at the receptionist office. Instead of a receptionist at the desk, was a small black bear with a scar across its face. I stopped dead in my tracks.
“She is on my break if you are looking for the old lady. Can I give her a message?”
I was quite impressed by how the bear’s voice sounded. He half grunted the words.
“I see you already know we can talk. To be honest I am not fond of eating human flesh.”
“Wait, what?
“That is why you are here, right?”
“Excuse me?”
“Although, yeah, maybe this is something they don’t tell the meal. I’m so dumb. Stupid Flippy. So stupid.”
The good news was I understood part of their plan for me and of course the bad news was that it would probably cost me my life.
“Wait, wow you run fast for a human.”
That was Chuck behind me. His mere presence sent chills down my spine.
“We aren’t fixing your car yet by the way.”
“In a couple minutes Manny is going to –”
“Speak of the devil,” I said. “Manny, what is going on?”
He handed me a muzzle.
“Your dinner is in there. Please find some rest and have a wonderful stay.”
“Enough!”
I threw the muzzle onto the floor and grabbed Chuck by the neck
“I swear I’ll kill your stupid monkey if you don’t take me home right now.”
“Boss, what do I do?”
“Torture him if he kills me. Simple as that.”
To be honest I had no idea what to do. My bargaining chip was a filthy little monkey and I was hopeless.
“Forgive me, but it sounded like you wanted to kill me anyway. You eat humans… forgive me for being slightly scared.”
“Put him down and we can all have a talk.”
Slowly I put Chuck down, not knowing what my fate would be. I sure had a feeling that it would not be a good one, but I did what I thought was best at the time.
“We know we aren’t your regular hotel and yes, we sometimes kill humans- ”
“Please don’t add a but to that sentence- ”
“But, we give all humans a fighting chance.”
The monkey looked at me and smiled.
“You must come with me to the casino. We can play blackjack.”
Playing blackjack was probably the last thing I wanted to do that night.
“I don’t want to.”
“I ask nicely only once, human.”
“Manny is a human too.”
“Manny was a human, gave up that evil privilege long ago.”
The man nodded, his eyes full of admiration for the primate. He changed his expression and looked at me. I did not enjoy the idea of being thought less than by the creatures around me. They surely didn’t care about me except maybe for the meat. Even though that thought did not make sense either.
I followed Chuck nonetheless. Manny was behind me and was carrying a club. On our way to the casino I could hear many animals. A sheep bleated, parrots squawked and I was sure I had seen at least three cows. Animals roamed around and they could speak English. I would be the first to say that it wasn’t perfect English, but they were animals after all. Animals didn’t speak every day or any day that I could remember.
The casino was dark at first, but Chuck clapped his hands and the lights started to flicker. The slot machines stood in rows and were surrounded by piles of hay. The whole place smelled like a farm. A chicken sat on the black jack table between straw and cards. Me? My mouth was wide open. I started to walk forward slowly, minding the club behind me. I had no intention of getting my head knocked with that thing.
“So William, you said you are not a gambling man, yet here you are. You may not have that much to win, but oh boy, do you have something to lose.” Chuck was jumping up and down as he spoke.
“Now hold on, please, don’t do this.”
“Remove your shirt, and I will give you a hundred chips.”
“I don’t want to.”
He kept speaking. Some of the animals started to show their faces. They peeped out from the darker edges of the room. Some of them were sniffing the air, perhaps gaining the scent of me. Maybe even judging whether I would be tasty.
“For every five minutes you lose a chip and if you reach zero we take something of you.”
“Something of me? What are you talking about?”
And with that, Chuck rang a bell and a large clock on the wall lit up. Beneath it, were the digits of a stop watch. The clock started ticking so I immediately headed to the blackjack table. It was about the only game in a casino I knew how to play. I have heard tales of mathematicians figuring out how to cheat. I wished then that I had read more about it. Instead, I was lost, surrounded by animals trying to play some sick game with me. Chuck hopped onto the table and stuck a pack into a shuffling machine. He handed me a watch and I put it on. I had to do what he wanted.
It did not take me long to realize that I was going to face some challenges. The house wins after all and I could not just keep gambling with chips to save my life. After the first half hour I was up by only seven chips and I wanted to take bigger risks. Even though we played with physical chips all of mine were banked into the digital watch on my wrist. It also ran down with time.
“May I sleep if I want?”
“It is your time.”
“It is my time.” I said this softly to myself. My head was starting to pound with pain.
Bigger bets started looking more lucrative especially when I started to get tired. Maybe my luck would get worse. It had been okay thus far, but I didn’t want to think about what they would do to me. I only had to figure out a way to escape while moving around the machines and tables. Perhaps there would be a duct or an open door. Overpowering Manny or some of the animals would do me no good. That was out of the question, and even if by some miracle I got away I had to hope they weren’t lying about having my car fixed.
Chuck sat there with his hairy behind on the green table. The room was only dimly lit then. I could hear a dog barking every now and then. Apparently many of the animals were the gambling types. Slot machines were spinning and classical music played in the background. I put down thirty of the chips I had. There was no real choice. Soon enough I would fall asleep or make decisions under the influence of fatigue.
“Hit me,” I said and tapped my hand on the table.
I turned over a ten of clubs.
“Hit me.”
It was a king of diamonds that turned over. That was good enough for me.
“Stand.”
I was always happy to have twenty points, but on this occasion I wasn’t so lucky. Of course it had to happen on this risky bet. He revealed his hand and my gut wrenched when he turned over a queen of hearts and an ace of spades. This meant that I had three hundred and eighty five minutes.
I stood up from the table and walked towards the bathroom sign. I needed a minute to get my head straight. No one followed me, but they did watch me. Cats, dogs and even a horse were in the casino and by the sound of things many animals were entering it now late at night. They may have been intelligent, but they were filthy as ever. I entered the bathroom and splashed water into my face. My eyes had dark bags under them. I walked around in the bathroom and found a ventilation shaft. Its cover seemed old and rusty. What was weird was that there was a light in the shaft. My curiosity woke me up a little.
“You are taking too long.” It was the voice of the black bear.
I ran to the door and used the janitors cart to block it. I also jammed a mop underneath the lever. Yes, I was somewhat lucky.
“What are you doing in there?”
I ignored him. I went to the shaft and loosened the screws, but each time I turned a screw. I heard a screeching of tires. I coughed a little. My throat was so dry. The noises sounded far away.
“I’m coming in.”
The door banged. I loosened the last screw and smelt the smell of rubber. I had to get out of this place. I had to move away. I had to get my mind and nerves under control. At long last, I opened the vent and I entered it. My body pained as I crawled toward the light. Behind me, I heard the door break down. The light was too bright for my eyes. I wish I had my sunglasses with me. My hands brushed against the metal, which started feeling awfully like leather. The sounds of tires screeching rang in my ears. I felt like something was propelling me forward.
When I opened my eyes I sat with my hands on the wheel of my granddaddy’s car. The tires of my car had popped. I was thinking about the exam I had written, but something bothered me. Something I could not explain. I checked my phone to see if I had signal. I had none. I was in the dessert and I wondered where the gas station I had passed earlier were. I felt scared. I felt like something was chasing me. I had had this accident before. I had. I walked away from my car and into the dessert. I don’t know what compelled me. There stood a cactus throwing a lonely piece of shade onto the sand. I went to sit next to it and a lizard walked up to me. It was walking on its hind legs.
“Strange weather we are having?”
“Strange whether for sure.”
“You aren’t surprised I can talk?”
“I’m surprised I survived that accident.”
“Have some cactus juice,” the lizard said.
He stuck some tap into the cactus and handed me glass.
I drank it slowly, it was better than nothing. I had left my water in the car. This road was dead quiet and I did not have much hope of someone passing by.
“Can you believe that they fired a monkey in Wisconsin just because he was a monkey?”
“What work did he do?” I asked.
“He was an accountant.”
“That’s a shame. All animals are equal.”
“Except you humans.” The lizard laughed. “Oppressing everyone everywhere.”
“Yeah, we are the worst I said.” I laughed, but his comment hurt me a bit.
He pat me on the back.
“I know a place you can stay. It isn’t far from here. Many animals live in harmony and they have a casino and hotel. I hear another primate is running that place and he cares about humans too.”
I took another sip of the cactus juice. I was no gambler, but I decided that I would hitchhike my way to that hotel. After all, I had nothing to lose.