Sri Lanka Ride - Day 5, the day of 1000 bends

Route: Mapakada - Kandy - Nuwara Eliya (Little England Town)
Kms: approx 120
Hrs: 8+
Road: Some SUPER-slick twisty 2 lane blacktop before lunch. After lunch, super intense winding single lane blacktop into single lane sketchy track and back to superb never-ending twisties
Weather: Overcast & pissing rain... not really cold until the last 30 minutes. Patches of sunshine

Just going to start with saying this is probably the most incredible day on a motorbike I've ever had - the roads and scenery were nothing short of mind-blowing, its just a shame that photos will NEVER do justice to what we saw...

Had breakfast with a group of oldies from Aus and NZ who were on a food tour of SL that actually sounded interesting. They thought I was insane for riding around the Island. Said goodbye to Big Mama and headed back up 18 bends road towards Kandy.

As we approached the spot were we passed the van/truck accident yesterday it started to rain, and not 5 minutes after we passed the spot Mo lost the front wheel from underneath him mid-corner and slid across the road a good 15m - thank Christ the bus coming the other direction was about 10 seconds away. Fortunately there were no injuries or damage, except he bent his gear select lever. He tried to fix it with his hand and ended up snapping it off which was pretty funny. I showed him how he could still use the flat part of the lever, so we cruised down the road until we passed a little roadside shop where I guy was welding up a tuk-tuk. The fix-it job was done in 10 mins and we were back on the road.

The rain stopped as we approached the outskirts of Kandy, and the police/army presence was definitely obvious. There were probably about a dozen different shops & properties over a 3km stretch of road that had been either torched or trashed... probably Muslim businesses.

I had to smirk when I rode past a roadside Buddhist temple which was being protected by 6 guards, then a couple of hundred metres down the road there was a Mosque being protected by 1 guard. Clearly a home team bias.

In the main centre of Kandy Mo took me straight to the main Buddhist temple - I had no idea what there was to actually see in Kandy, so was down for whatever. I walked around the building and wasn't blown away by what I saw... the crowds were big and to go inside I had to take my riding boots off. I went to a tourist info desk and read a brochure about what was inside - a museum of Buddhist art from the ages. I couldn't be arsed with taking my boots off to look at paintings and statues of Buddhas, so went back to the bikes and we went for a feed.

Mo took me to a great spot up a hill overlooking the whole city. We ended up having lunch there so we could soak it all up.

The rain started again as we ate lunch, and was still coming down as we jumped back on the bikes. We took a narrow back road that continued up the hills away from the city & traffic. This is where the narrow twisty, winding roads started and would continue non-stop for the next 4hrs. For the first 30 minutes it felt like a computer game dodging all the tuk-tuks coming the opposite direction, but the roads became quiet shortly after. The roads started off sealed & smooth, but over time deteriorated to horrible, bumpy, puddle-filled roads that were an absolute blast to ride. After an hour the rain stopped, but the roads were still slick.

The scenery we passed was spectacular - tea plantations, jungle, rocks, cliffs; it was constantly changing. Even though in hindsight we were only about 2hrs out of Kandy, I have rarely felt so completely isolated and in the middle of absolutely nowhere. The thought crossed my mind that if something happened and we needed an ambulance, it would take far longer than 2hrs for it to get to us.

Riding past the people who live amongst the plantations and the little dirt-poor communities was fascinating... fascinating to see how people live like this - with nothing. The workers were short; skinny; gaunt with hard, sunken lines on their faces and looked as old as the hills. I barely saw anyone wearing shoes. Most buildings were made from wooden planks and sheets of corrugated iron. I hope the memory of these people and places stay with me because I didn't manage to take any photos - will have to make an effort in the coming days.

Big Mama asked Mo this morning if he was taking me to a famous tea factory & restaurant in the hills - and apparently he was. She said that the chocolate cake they served "was the best in the world", so I was really looking forward to a break and a big chunk of choccie cake. The road was now 2 lanes, and being dry Mo and I absolutely hammered up the winding hill to the tea factory, stopping along the way at a couple of lookouts.

We reached the tea factory and fancy tea rooms overlooking the plantation. I was hanging to get the world's greatestgreatest chocolate cake into my face, so Mo went and grabbed us a couple of slices.... and it was bloody average. 1 layer. All over in 4 mouthfuls. Clearly Big Mama has never been to The Cheescake Factory.

It was a 12km ride down into Nuwara Eliya, and it started raining again but this time with a howling wind that was properly cold. Coming into Nuwara Eliya it was full of extremely British-looking hotels & estates... We pulled into our stay for the night and it couldn't have looked more British. I felt like the city needed more exploring befor dark, so I told Mo we should go for a lap around town. The whole town looked like the UK countryside, with pubs n all - I asked Mo if this was the town Big Mama told me about that's called "Little England Town"... It was. Thanks Mo.

Unloaded the bags back at the hotel and was DYING for a warm shower... except it wasn't to be. The fucking greenies who own the guesthouse decided that the hot water should come from the fucking sun - so when it's cloudy and cold (the time you'd most want a warm shower) then tough titties. I was livid.

Told Mo we should go for dinner at 7.30, but at 7.15 it started absolutely pissing rain. I figured Mo would come past my room and we'd discuss the situation, but he never came... it was pretty obvious we weren't going anywhere in a monsoon. (WhatsApp is currently blocked here, so we weren't able to message each other). At 9 the rain stopped and I went out to the manager's room to ask if he could take me to Mo. Mo was in another building, but came to my room a few minutes later... turns out Mo was waiting for me in reception at 7.30, waited 15mins and then went to dinner without me. Didn't cross his mind to come last my room apparently. Thanks Mo.

Jumped on the bike and headed down to a British-looking pub we passed earlier by myself. The town looked much different at night & I wasn't 100% sure how to get back as the streets in town were one way and a bit confusing. Made it to the bar ok & was sat next to the only person in the entire bar wearing a suit, who was American named Rob. Rob was from a place I'd never heard of called Provenance, and he had one of the strangest accents I've EVER heard - imagine the worst aspects of New York and Boston accents rolled into 1. Robs accent was only made more bizarre by the way he spoke, and the way he spoke was only made more bizarre by the pipe he smoked which was made from a corn of corn. You couldn't make this shit up - he could have been a character from Family Guy.

The bar closed-up at 10.30 and I was back on the bike after a few pints. In the 90mins I was inside the pub, I swear the whole town had turned off the lights and I couldn't recognise a thing - not a single landmark I'd noted earlier in the night or again on the way to the pub. I took a guess and rode down a road and didn't recognise anything for a good 400m, so decided to do a u-turn at the roundabout ahead, but at the roundabout was the huge white hotel I had to turn at to get home. I cracked myself up.