APATHETIC- A STATE OF SHOWING NO INTEREST, ENTHUSIASM OR EMOTION! (2)
"I changed my mind seeing that you need space"
What the fuck was that? Really, that was low, even for you..... Friday! Yes Friday!!!
I was snapping some pictures at the back corner of the house when she came, I had no idea she was around but I thank God I had gone inside and wore my wig before she came, else I'd be looking sick. He was the one that came with the news. No problems, I said to myself that I was going to act indifferent, that I would be cool so that she doesn't get any vibe from the both of us, luckily, I got my cousins hair for a distraction. We kept doing it and laughing at jokes from the awkwardness happening in the house. It was funny. Funny because She - the girlfriend, was feeling so uncomfortable in her boyfriend's house. To prove whatever point she was trying to prove, she pulled her trouser and walked around the house on panties, it was cute but at the same time wrong, because other guys had access to the house. I saw her trying to do things she wouldn't normally do just to prove her point. Then again, not my business.
Moving on... to the question of how am I feeling?
I am fucking sure they fucked in that bathroom. While I was in the kitchen cooking.... Burned! But that isn't the part playing with my head. It's the fact that this sudden jealousy covered me, so much that I was speechless, my mood literally went down, I had no zeal to do anything anymore but I still controlled that feeling as usual to get through the day. But then I found out that she actually told him "are you really going to eat that?" Oh My God! That literally made me flip. But I still curbed it, the fact that I handled it the way I did made it worse for me, I started being moody, trying so hard to relate with everyone like I was okay, then slowly I became blue, then I ended up falling sick.
Once again my rational thinking says "you shouldn't feel anyways, she's his girlfriend"
True to that, but I can't help it. He called me, I couldn’t pick, I didn’t know how I'd respond to him. Then I decided to call him finally when I had the energy to - no reply.
We spoke today, I'm not feeling too good. I tried to make it sound like I am okay. He said he'd come, he didn’t... And guess what his reason was?
"I changed my mind seeing that you need space"
That's it! I'm done, not doing this to myself anymore.
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