RE: The Updated Steemit Etiquette Guide - New Additions and Your Help Needed
I have noticed a few users making the kind of remarks on images of women that are quite immature and frankly I would expect from a 13 year old boy.
That needs examples cuz otherwise it's just making assumptions and is paternalism toward women.
I know I wouldn't want dudes to feel extra self-conscious or not comment on a post after knowledge of my gender. Personally I like immature humour and lewdness so long as it is done in the spirit of fun and comedy.
"Stalking" should be clearly defined as well. Or will it just default as a male posting on a females content five times a day, one times a day? everyday? The only definition I can think of stalking is one user asking another user to leave them alone and if they continue then it is stalking.
There was a particular user who was deliberately going after female members of the community in a distinctly unsavoury way.
As in threats and unwelcomed sexual comments?
Not paternalism at all IMO. If guys don't speak up and tell the immature among them their conduct sucks then they keep doing it. In my experience most immature males who engage in poor behaviour towards women don't care when they get told by a woman. In fact, they take it as a badge of honour.
It's one thing to make off-colour remarks to a woman who they know and can appreciate the humour and where it is coming from. It's quite another to make it to someone you don't know. Even within my circle of acquaintances there are guys who can make off-colour remarks and I will laugh without a second thought and there are others will make the same remark and I'll want to knock them into next week. In most cases, it has to do with their overall respect towards women that makes the difference on how the remark is received.
Some guys prefer negative attention from women over positive, definitely. that's another reason why it's such a bind women have for how to react. I like that post stephmackenzie wrote about violent reactions to men having their catcalls being rejected
It's not paternalism to stand up for a woman. Only if its decided for her what she should be offended by. I guess we all can experience the same 'damned if I do damned if I dont' feeling.
The bind women have for how to react is the conditioning they receive to just allow bad behaviour from males and not push back. The worst of it is that all too often it is other women who try to push that conditioning.
That is one of the main reasons so many males think they have a god given right to be disrespectful towards women, cause women aren't suppose to respond, at least in their little minds. That's unacceptable and other guys calling them out on their bad behaviour is the strongest approach to putting a stop to it.
How do you know that's what women think?
I will tell a guy off if he disrespects me in public just for the principle of it. But otherwise I'll just tell him he can go online and pay for a woman to talk shit to him cuz I ain't in the business for money so I aint gonna be in it for free
why wouldn't I know about the conditioning women receive? Have certainly observed enough of it happening.
Well said.
thank you
We will have to agree to disagree then.
Looks like you defined it. I would think it obvious in most cases.
Yes.
Agree to disagree yes. More specifically I would not like someone flagging a response to my comments/posts for the reason that they would assume it 'offensive to women.' but I also can only speak for myself and not others
but the lewd-stalkerish types seem to seek out targets who they sense would become upset and offended...funny how it works. So I'm not meaning to imply I don't think people should condone any of those behaviors via tolerance
No that's fine and you are right. These kind of personality types get off on people responding so sometimes it is better not give them any attention. It's just in some cases they are so persistent and can make death threats and dox people which raises it to another level.
It's good you take it seriously because a lot of people don't then an abused person can be 'gaslighted'. "You're just over-reacting" type BS. I like to respect peoples varying sensitivities.
I think it is being conscious of the fact that you don't know everybody on here and you should use the same kind of politeness and sensitivity that you would in public.
I understand what you are saying. I think it depends on the situation and how well you know the people. Also I don't think you would get flagged simply for saying something that was mildly offensive. My point is we shouldn't make it a haven for sexism.