PLEASE DON'T LAUGH ALONE IF UR GIRLFRIEND SENT U THIS LETTER AND IT IS READ BY UR SISTER, HOW WILL U FEEL???

Letter from Sikira of Ilorin
Dear olalekan, longs time no see. If they say is
water that will cook fish finish, I will not belif it.
Is this how other lofers are behafe to theirself?
U haf refus to call me for the past one mont.
and if I tries ur numba, mtn will be say your
numba is unreach, is unreach.
You refus to fisit me efen when u ear that my
father haf contract guinea worm. Is this how to
treat ur in-laws? I know we haf not marry but I
know uer my horseband from heafen.
Efri day when I am wake up, uer the first
person I see. Roshida tell me for last week that
she see u with one girl in front of Mr big. She
efen tell me that u hog together.
If u think u can leaf me uer decive urself.
Olalekan,olalekan, how many times I call u? It
will not be better for anybody that wan to
scatter our middle.
Any way the mane purpose of my letter is to
tell u that I haf took in for u. I go for testing
yesterday to confarm it.
My grandmar talk that it be like am carrying
twins. I haf been fery fery happy since
yesterday. I haf give the twins name o......sifau
and musibau.
I don't sure if u like it. Come n see me
tomorrow bcos I am fery weak now. Silifa, my
younger sister, comes home with her boyfriend
yesterday.if u see d boy,very Hansome but not
up to you sha.he also get a swagger. I want u to
get one too. Let I forget, please dont forget to
send the money for the aso-
ebi for anti taiba's naming o.
The color is red and yellow.Red for the 'buba',
and yellow for the 'iro'. They said we can use
any color for the 'gele'. But me I want to use
blue. I will now wear that my green curf shoe.
I cannot wait to send you the photo. My lof, ten
is happening in this world o. dont say I am the
one that tell you o.i hear that it's not anti
taiba's horseband that gif her the belle that she
use to born the pregnancy. True true, the baby
is not resemble him. But what consign me?This country sef don tire me.
I go school - Cultism
I no go school - Illiteracy
I write jamb - Boko haram
I go university. - Strike
I travel by air - Plane crash
I travel by sea - Militant
I travel by road - Accident
I enter bus for b/stop -
{GBOOAA!} bomb blast
I go bank - Armed robbers
I go relax outside - Kidnappers
I vex use leg waka go village -
Witch craft
I dey house - No work
I go work - Low salary
I wan marry - No money
I wan sleep with my gf - HIV
Make i shake person - Ebola
Person no safe for this country at
all.