Oh life, why are you so cruel?

One time, me and a couple of my friends, along with some other people I didn't know, were driving back home from the movies. It was a short drive, couldn't have been more than ten minutes, but it felt like eternity. Despite it being a short drive, it was long enough for something to go horribly "wrong." Something I will never, ever forget. I sat quietly in the rear seat behind the driver, who drove rather furiously; my left forearm peacefully rested upon the door's leather armrest. While I listened to people's chitter-chatter, the driver was happily flying through the corners. About midway to my friend's house, just seconds before that fatal moment occurred, people stopped talking for a brief moment, and a complete silence ensued, during which the driver made yet another reckless turn, only this one being a particularly strong one. The car raced through the corner, and... stayed firmly on the road, as nothing happened! Almost, that is. What happened was that due to the frantic turn, my arm slipped from the armrest and, in combination with the leather, produced a "brilliant" fart-like sound. (I wanted you to get a better feel for the story, so I spent a while trying to find the sound of the fart, or at least a similar one. By doing so, not only did I find, imho, a very accurate sound, but I also learned the name of that fart. You can check the fart HERE. The name of the fart is Echole. It has to be, right? I mean, if someone makes a 14 minute video about 99 different types of farts, clearly he is the expert. Plus, if you have some spare time, watch the whole video and learn a thing or two about farts. You never know when these things come in handy.)

Anyway, the silence took on a whole new meaning... Now, imagine an introvert in that position. Also, imagine the introvert being very high. Be those my best friends, I wouldn't make a huge deal out of the awkward situation and would most probably crack a joke at it (you know, play it cool), because, let's face it, there really is no point in defending yourself, unless you want to look like a dick. It’s not like you say, "Guys, I honestly didn't fart, that sound was caused by my hand, when it slipped from the armrest, m'kay?" and surely everyone goes, "Right, that happens, sorry dude, don’t know what we were thinking." Don't think so... Well, me being 23 at the time, I did what every young grown up, honest and sensible man would do – I blamed it on the girl sitting next to me..... Just kidding:D

I quickly needed to figure out a way of making fun of the whole situation, but also phrase it in a way, so every one would acknowledge the fact, that I didn't fart. Given the complex task at hand, my brain immediately went into overdrive. As ideas and theories on how to deal with the problem in a non-dickish matter started to emerge in my head, another few seconds of embarrassing silence passed. I wasn't so sure if I should even be saying anything, and I couldn't come up with something fairly quickly, so in the end, I said nothing, which is basically like saying, "Yes, I farted," only worse. Before long, the driver was there to save the day with a well thought out remark. In my native language (Czech), he literally said, "Good fart." To which the girl sitting next to him added in an almost embarrassed tone, "Um, yeah... " To make matters worse, the two people next to me were also girls. Still, it wouldn't bother me much, the devastating part of the story is that the girl, who added that wonderful comment, was a girl I had an extremely HUGE crush on...

Let's just say...

... because anything that happens, happens.