Depression in Adolescents and How to Overcome them

SOME years ago, when I was studying (again) psychology, I was given the responsibility of accompanying a child. Call it his name Budi.

Budi had just been in the third grade of high school, but his academic grades had steadily declined since the second grade. The principal assigned me to find out why and he said, is it possible to help Budi restore his achievements.

Because, first class time, academic value is not bad. I also began studying his family and academic backgrounds through the files in the school about Budi.

Verbal information is also trying to get me from principals, homeroom teachers, and other teachers who have interacted with Budi. In addition, I also contact his parents who are on the other side of the island all ask permission mentoring.

Luckily his parents are quite open and even urged me to help restore the achievements of his son.

The information I get matches the information from the school. Parents also say, Budi turned into a quiet since the second grade of high school. In fact, less than 10 months later Budi and his classmates have to take college entrance exams.

I say the parents are cooperative because I have done other children's mentoring and found his parents ignorant or others suspicious of me. Duh ....

For the record, effective psychological counseling for children can only occur if both parents are compact.

Once complete, I just started to get acquainted with Budi. As usual, initially stiff. Budi hesitated. The first impression when chattingmemang this child is very, very not confident. However, I do not push myself. Said the Javanese, witing tresna jalaran saka kulina. Trust will grow over time. Counselors should not be in a hurry.

Almost a month Budi just say a little, more I chatted around. From these short chats, I found that Budi likes playing games, I install on a computer (PC because I do not have a laptop) game like Budi's.

My computer was bothered when I installed the first person shooter (FPS) game heavily, but it's okay that what matters can be a chat. Just in the second month I was "allowed" to stop by his boarding house to play games.

Budi's boarding room is not messy, instead tends to be neat and clean. However, what I noticed was the laptop and its sophisticated sound system. I drool look at it. It was only in the second month that our chat began to get more fluid.

Budi started to say a lot. I am also acquainted with some children who are one floor with kosnya.

Based on the information from Budi himself and from his friends one floor boarding, apparently since the second grade, Budi who lives in the school next to the school is often in bully (rundung) brother class, both in school and in kosnya, both verbally and physically.

I deliberately did not explore how the details of his harassment. Her complainant has graduated and no longer live in her boarding house. Budi when first grade achievement and quite confident. However, it drastically changed 180 degrees to a quiet, moody, aloof, and pessimistic weight. Almost no friends at all.

Only friends across from her room she sometimes talks to. Since then, Budi also never able to focus on learning, the value of his lessons so shambles. Most time he spent in the room. Play game, but Budi is not addicted. If allowed to continue, Budi's depressive condition can certainly be more severe.

After full information, I also have "mastered" the school environment and boarding house, just the second half of the month I can run my therapy. I use cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) techniques, flexible therapy, can be simple, but effective and important without side effects.

I also took him fitness routine again because first time Budi's first class was once a member of the fitness club. I accompanied him to join my campus fitness club, which is cheap on the list I mean. However, just a few weeks, he asked to move to a fitness club next to a more complete equipment.

I also agreed, but with a grimace for having to reach my thinner pockets deeper. But it's okay. What can we do about it. For a week a few times can treat a potential lunch wife somewhat tolerable, so treat and chatting in the campus canteen wrote. Fortunately my future wife is also my class sister, just relax.

But to my surprise, Budi started an initiative. Though my therapy has not been running a week.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) was popularized by Albert Ellis, a senior psychologist from Columbia University and Aaron T. Beck, a psychiatric professor from the University of Pennsylvania by adopting the behavioral concepts of Albert Bandura and Alfred Adler's cognitive concepts.

We can googling these names to know the roots of the theory. The point in this CBT is behavior (behavior) is influenced by the feeling (feeling), while the feeling is influenced by the mind / cognition (thought).

So with certain techniques, if we can influence the mind then in turn will be able to change our behavior.

According to Beck (2011) our thoughts are generally always distorted. This distortion is normal and happens to anyone. But it could be because the influence of environmental distortion can be excessive.

Heavily distorted minds usually appear constantly and continuously to lead a person to depression.

Some examples of distortions include:

• Over-Generalizing: For example, for some reason we fail to achieve something. We think of us as people who will always fail, can never succeed. Or somebody is sad to break up, then conclude that the loss will ruin his life forever. Or vice versa - Mind Reading: We feel able to make sure people's minds. "Ah sure he thought I was stupid" .. "Ah sure he thinks I hurt him". Though there is no evidence at all that the person states so.- Catastophizing: Always think the worst outcome. Someone who will learn to drive a car, feel driving will be very dangerous because it can crash. Someone who will start a business, but is afraid of losing all his capital.- Fortune Telling: it is like "I know for sure, I will not be able to do that" without trying to try. Or being an expert and thinking "I know I can do it", then become careless, dismissive, no longer learning.

In this CBT, the process I try simplifikasi so hopefully can be practiced anyone. Before therapy starts there should be approval from all parties, both Budi himself, the school, and parents. So the therapeutic process can run smoothly.

Psychological accompaniment will be more difficult to achieve and longer reach the goal if there is one party that is less agree, or not cooperative. Especially when psychological assistance is done for children.

The first thing to do is to set goals. Set shared goals. I do not think there is much need to discuss more about bully cases and details because it does not happen.

We are more of a positive past to move forward. Then me and Budi determine the main purpose of this therapy process is to pass UGM (UGM) entrance examination.

Since first grade Budi liked mathematics and physics lessons, he also wanted to enter the engineering faculty. At first Budi hesitate, but I remind you that actually he can. The proof of the first-class time never participate in such a competition or olympics science exact sciences.

The second thing is, in each session held once a week or two weeks depending on needs. The main objective is broken down into small goals with simple assignments in each session that will be evaluated later in the session. For example, add a new friend in the tutoring place.

In the next session I asked some details about his new friend, did Budi know his name, where his school, where his home, how many brothers, etc.

Every week there will always be a new task that aims to increase confidence, initiative, and start a conversation. I will dug this task if it fails to happen, why, and will be repeated again on the next week's assignment.

At each session I will do a mood check, what feelings appear in a week and in the scale of 1 to 10 brapa.

The third thing is, as I pointed out in the second point. Use flashcard. What is that? It's a kind of emotional scale card to identify its feelings and developments.

Every emotion, such as fear, anxiety, anger, joy, confusion, etc. is made scale 1 to 10. What are the problems that arise in the assignment, and how to overcome them.

I usually always encourage Budi to think for himself how the solution and help him monitor the results.

The fourth thing is to stay focused. In the course of therapy lasted several months. There must always be other annoying things. For example, because it's a bit confident. Budi wants to "shoot" girls, well this I will try to be postponed until the small goals are achieved, and the big goal is settled. Do not let things beyond the main goal will further damage the therapeutic process.

Lastly, always ask for feedback or feedback on the therapeutic process. Feelings of being forced to follow therapy, for example, being asked by parents about the value of the lesson and making Budi depressed, is important to identify.

So the counselor can remind his parents to be more patient, not make under pressure. So the development is no longer asked directly, but through me.

The total time I need is quite long, because the process of rapport building or the process of "introduction" is also not easy, that's just two months. The therapy process lasts for nearly six months with sessions weekly to fortnightly.

At that time the therapy has been a few months finished, I also have long farewell with the principal of the school.

Just hanging out on campus suddenly entered sms (at that time there is no whatsapp) in my old school. I see the sender, from Budi. "Mas ... Alhamdulillah, I accept in Mechanical Engineering UGM. Thank you very much mas ... "Typical Budi, sms his short, to the point.

"Same Budi ...," I reply short smsnya too, then I close my phone and walk with his own smile. Happiness is simple…