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RE: The Day I Became An Individualist

in #teamaustralia7 years ago (edited)

This example that I heard sticks in my brain:

Imagine that as an adult you have been planning and dreaming of getting a new car, and when you finally bring your new car home, someone asks if they can borrow it. You say no, but then are informed by several other people that you MUST SHARE!

That is what it is like for a child that has a special toy. We should not imagine that they don't share the same feelings that we as adults do.
There should be toys for sharing with other children that are visiting, or with siblings, BUT if the child has something very special to them, they should be able to keep that toy in a special safe spot where nobody else is allowed to access it.

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I posted about this memory intentionally as it had an effect on me as an adult. The real meaning of the post to me is, I think that people down play the "meta" nature of what they learned (or experienced) followed by how they process and act on it later.

Learning to "share" or learning to "respect other peoples property" (I'm suggesting) has ramifications for how we feel about the right to own private property or whether we should redistribute wealth. The weaker child after this experience will feel entitlement towards other peoples property.

There should be toys for sharing with other children that are visiting, or with siblings, BUT if they child has something very special to them, they should be able to keep that toy in a special safe spot where nobody else is allowed to access it.

I agree with this that sharing (especially within the family & close friends) should be something that a child learns, but not for the sake of sharing. Rather I think kids should learn benevolence or why sharing is fulfilling, especially in the situations you described over "automatic sharing" coupled with respect for other peoples autonomy. I strongly feel that this can not be achieved in kindergarten, child care or school (caveat: without major re thinking of these institutions).

There should be toys for sharing with other children that are visiting, or with siblings, BUT if they child has something very special to them, they should be able to keep that toy in a special safe spot where nobody else is allowed to access it.

I think this is a good point, and if I was to try and extrapolate that out to adult behaviour, we might be able to say that this is an indication of our future ideas on how we look after our things; how we consume things etc. Recently I have discovered something special to me, and now I have a special safe spot for metals ;) I still have the mentality of a 5 year old.

Thanks for your comment, you were one of the first people who interacted and provided encouragement when I first started on steemit.

Yes, at least for some things it should be the choice of the child's whether they want to share something or not. I see that this may have indications in later life too where not only things but people's bodies and minds become community property.

It is possible that those like Dennis in the story above feel they have the rights to a persons private world and with the voyeuristic culture we have developed, lines from looking to touching are likely to get increasingly crossed. And if they are met by resistance, violence is more likely as they have not learned the emotional intelligence and control required to handle 'not getting what you want'.

As you are very well aware but I will repeat here, these formative years have deep impacts on children in bothe positive and negative. And again as you know, many people's attempts at 'good' actually drive a host of developmental problems in the future.

The road to hell is paved with good intentions, my professor used to say. Unfortunately your right that these ideas that are formed about "things"cross over into how people interact with other people.

The future is not just that others will feel that bodies or minds will be community property, it is that the people themselves will believe this and offer these things willingly, which is infinitely worse. The coercion is happening now, so it will seem normal later. examples of this are facebook, tinder or ...insert google app here. Tinder is particularly dangerous experiment, I can see the effect it has on my much younger class mates currently. Sex is as easy as ordering takeout you just need to get the timing right for availability. It reminds me of a pre-cursor to behaviour described in Brave New World (refer below). Even my class mates can't imagine what would be the next progression from here, but I think we can all see where this will go.
https://steemit.com/teamaustralia/@louisbettong/aldus-huxley-s-predictions-of-today-and-future