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RE: The stupid myth of the book "The Secret" .
I read the secret and watched the documentary. Immediately after it seemed to work. I had a lot of positivity ... in the beginning. A small desires came to me almost 'magically'. I did discover that a positive mind set works ... it just works because you feel better and feeling better is its own reward. The problem with an approach like the secret is it has us focusing on 'desires' and these desires grow in our mind and begin to overshadow any happiness created. Desires will arise and it is good for the human psyche to work for something. But ultimately healthy living and balance is the key to happiness. Desires have a tendency to throw one off balance.
Desires are natural. If we didn't have them we wouldn't do anything in life. Putting pressure on creating happiness that is where people fail. Focus on living and you are good. Most think they are living but they aren't. They are always somewhere else. This is what cause bad feelings because you know you are doing something you shouldn't. Now I label the last as you shouldn't but you get my point.
Desires arise naturally. That is true. Insisting on their fulfillment, however, leads to suffering. Linking contentment to the fulfillment of desires will continually deny one happiness. One can think of suffering and happiness as existing dualistically. But perhaps that is not true for everyone. When I speak of happiness I mean existing without suffering and not necessarily existing in a state of exaltation. 'Concentrating on living' can mean many things to many people. But what I can tell you without hesitation and with complete assertion is that pinning happiness to the fulfillment of desires denies one contentment and leads to suffering. Unless you have figured a way to achieve each and every desire. But otherwise, the more attached you are to your desires, the more you will suffer.
Yes I agree. Of course you should already be content. The state of suffering for majority as you say is very linked to people wanting another outcome instead of paying attention to the moment. They just have unrealistic expactations of what life is.
Oh but then why have desires if it is not going to be fulfilled to add to the happiness?
There are times I get what I want after I don't want it anymore so of course I don't take it since my want for it has passed. It just becomes a waste when that happens. :(
In the pursuit of desires we create new things and experience. That is why we have desires. It is only when we attach to desires that we suffer.
Yeah so when the desire is gone then should the suffering be gone too. Lol.
Desires are unlikely to go anywhere ... although they will evolve ... it is the attachment to desire that causes suffering. When desires are not attached to they are just ideas and do not cause suffering. Desires are also not just about physical desires ... they mean anything you want different from what actually is. So one can lose the desire to say be with someone but thoughts of that person can still bring suffering, if one is not accepting of what has transpired or the present situation. Ultimately it is the thought attached to desires that cause the suffering.