Feeling So Sad and Unhappy!

I want to believe every man gets to a stage in their life where it seems, a man is only existing but not living; everything becomes so gloomy, blurry and unexciting, it feels you are at the end of the road.
Depression, Frustration has become such an inevitable dessert for humans' consumption, where it seems the world is crashing on you, it seems all you've ever stood for is put to test, and it seems like you are becoming a failure in the pawn of game life; or perhaps what would you say of a young man filled with so much vigor, vibrancy, intellectual capacity, an irresistible IQ, working like an AI(artificial intelligence), every starts working as if you are in the realm of virtual realities, where things are working against you or it seems you may say, then you begin to wonder as your mind begins to wander like a lost human soul lost in this ephemeral world, A Man that has all things figured out, having mapped out his plans to build a world of unlimited opportunities for himself, the society and the world at large,and yet he's not given an opportunity, he tried seizing one but all efforts proved abortive, at this juncture he begins to ask himself, what is it about this so called vacuum of existence called life when all seems to have no meaning, it makes no sense, where many have built a fortress for themselves, enriching themselves with the hard earned wages,rewards, treasuries of the masses, the fragile, innocent masses, the supposed been lead by their leaders; all one can perceive,feel or experience all around is GREED, ADULTERY, FORNICATION, CORRUPTION, HUMAN SACRIFICES, all been operated on a higher magnitude, then I say to myself why will people not commit murder, suicide, perjury, genocide, homicides, corruption, massive election rigging, living in a world where the opinion of the populace does not matter, of course it does not because it does not count.

You will never blame people because this is what they experience, this is what they have been subjected to, living in a society where your declaration for a particular christian faith/denomination becomes a threat to other denominations, lives are threatened, believers are massacred, maimed, injured, inflicted with long sufferings of hunger, unemployment, a society where going to school does not guarantee a brighter future as against what obtains in the days of our fathers when you could brag and have some pedigree, dignity and integrity to move around in the society moving your shoulders, believing you are worth something and you have a price, and a value.
These were some of the thoughts on ma mind as i was walking home from church after closing from the Holy Mass; and today we celebrated the Solemnity of the Body and the Blood of Christ(Corpus Christi), which entails celebrating the humanity and the divinity of Christ as the only sacrifice offered once and for all for eternal redemption, salvation of souls, the spotless victim, the unblemish victim for redemption, through him all powers flows, our work of redemption is completed... Oops! Sorry i deviated a little!

Those were the thoughts on my mind, it all seems i'm locked up in the world of seclusion, in the world where pangs of death, pain, guilt and shame have become my cloak, and I said thought to myself loud, Why shouldn't I commit a suicide, because i have become so fed up of things not working out the ways, i had planned; accepting the reality that the year is 6 months gone already, i had planned since the beginning of the year to start up at least two businesses, and to apply for as many entrepreneurship scholarships, grants or aids from both local and international organisations and from government agencies, but look at me, it all look like an unrealistic reality, a dream with no edge of coming true, I couldn't start my two business which is aimed at not just satisfying or gratifying my personal ambitions, heart desires but it is aimed at creating job opportunities for a lot of young peoples, with my business proposals and feasibility studies done, yet the fund was never forthcoming, each business estimated start up capital is $500 dollars each, and I also promised to improve on my blogging, getting other gadgets that help simplify my work, and can also reduce stress for me.

Where I got tired

I did told you that life is so filled with lots of frustrations and depression, as i write this post to you all, it seems am already going insane as i couldn't bear anymore the shambles of life i have found myself, my phone has been hanging, to make just a post, i will have to restart my android smart phone at least 3 times or maximum 5 times, when i had already had a plan to get a PC(personal computer) popularly called a laptop, so that i can kick start my businesses, and then register them for corporate advantage, also that it can boost my project work as a final year student in the University.
Businesses i have not started, not registered, have not gotten a laptop, and couldn't get a brand new phone, that is why i said i am so sad and unhappy, and lastly say to myself, Why Shouldn't I commit Suicide?

Never, It will never Be, Because there is a light at the end if the tunnel.

Me? No oooo, never because i love myself too much, because i believe so much in the saying which have my personal philosophy that says, When there is life, there is Hope, and everything that happens to a man in life, will become a repertoire of experience which will eventually become an ocean of wisdom, insight and a conquerer. I will not die but I shall live to declare the goodness of God in the land of the living, so if you are out there, you may have thought or are thinking of ending your life because things are not working out the way you had planned/expected, believe in yourself, that you have the key, the solution to the problems of humanity, at least a solution to a particular problem of the society, trust for this is all you need, think about one problem, profer a solution and you will become irrefutable, indispensable, and undeniable, then will your light shine forth, do not believing, don't stop trying, and keep your head high standing tall, that one day your dream will come true. I believe as a person that this new week will be blissful and fruitful for me, what about you?

Ending the Day

I have been indoor since; for today, i went to church, sang for two Masses, and came back home and have been meditating, thinking and planning, strategising, also putting a work plan in place for the week, also I will be resuming my project work this week, will gist you guys later.

Don't just ask yourself why are things not working out, but say I will make things to work out.

Thanks once again and always @surpassinggoogle
Thanks also, another Man with a large heart @nathanmars

Happy new week to you all!