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     7 years ago 

    We partnered with a friend. She did not want to get left behind and she fell in love with the romance of living off grid but did not want to do the work. I found out later that she fully expected me to build her a house. We made a lot of mistakes and that is why I now recommend to people that if they want to build a community or even join mine, get your own land, build your own house and get all your needs met. When you have found within yourself the ability and will to be independent, then we can start working on inter-independent relationships. Until then, I shy away as I have a tendency to want to help people and then end up doing it for them. It does not serve them or me. I ended up in a co-dependent relationship and I quickly re-established my boundaries. She left after one year. House sat empty and died for nearly a decade. We sat there and watched a year of our life rotting away. It was heart breaking. So we will go it alone now as I find it difficult to find people who can handle being in an inter-independent relationship. Long story made short ... ish.

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     7 years ago 

    Such wise words @wwf. Community is always difficult even the community of two that is based on love ;) The more people are involved and the more grown up they get, the more potential of conflict there is. I decided for myslef, that even though I have a very strong desire to live in a community I will live "alone" with my wife and kids to accomplic cooperative community by helping others and exchanging things, work and support. This kind of "distant" community feels to be the very right thing for me!

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     7 years ago 

    I think that is very wise and that is exactly what we are doing as well. Bravo to you!

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     7 years ago 

    Its my wifes wisdom, not mine. I am a very lucky man!

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