Self-fulfilling Prophecy

In the books I have read during my teen years, one major plot of the series was the prophecies that heroes received.

The series I am talking about was the one with Percy Jackson. I forgot the exact name of the series since it has been a while when I last re-read it.

Anyway, these prophecies are given to heroes to have a dangerous quest. Most of them tell of a future that could mean death, and some prophecies held answers in the lines.

However, even with these prophecies, they have no way of knowing how any of the battles would turn.

In the books, they mentioned that some tried to escape the fate told by the prophecies by going against what was said. But instead of being saved, the prophecies still ended up being manifested into reality in a much more dangerous way.

I remember a scene in the books clearly, where the heroes wanted to try and cheat the prophecy. But they still ended up going through what was said because they have no way of predicting how everything would turn out. They followed a prophecy that could lead them to their doom.

In real life
There are no such prophecies in real life. Some claim they can predict the future bu no one can be too sure about what any of them say. After all, many people still try to take advantage of others.

But one thing that happens is self-fulfilling prophecies. These are the future scenarios that we conjured in our minds.

Some may be a good scenario of getting a job or receiving an award. While other maybe the fears that we have in our lives such as failing a subject or losing an important file.

When these unfortunate situations take place, we tend to feel a bit of relief that what we have thought have come to pass. Then came the crashing of wave realization of what happened.

Have we truly predicted the future? Or have we just acted in a way that brings that future to reality?

In truth, I do not have an answer for this one.

It differs from everyone's perspectives, after all. Some may believe that they can see the future coming months away, and some are just too scared of the future they fear that they end up facing the exact same situation.

I have personally experienced a few self-fulfilling prophecy.

One is about failing a subject where I did not like the teacher. Instead of studying for it, I just acted carelessly because in my mind I thought that I was going to fail anyway. It ended up being true. Most likely because of my own actions rather than any prediction that teenage me could have made.

The next one is when I got my scholarship, and a good qualifyin marks for the only University I applied at. I was really busy thinking about how these things would contribute to my life that I unknowingly worked hard for it.

Instead of just waiting for these two things to fall on my lap, I researched again and again until I feel like I know everything there is to know about them.

It worked in my favor as until now I am still enjoying both the scholarship, and my stay at that exact University.

I also "predicted" some other things out of my control such as an ex cheating on me.

This one, I believe that I just saw it coming because of my observation skills. And instead of doing anything about it, I just watched the scene unfold in front of my eyes. And when it finally comes to light, I was thinking "called it".

Although, I wonder if such a thing would have happened no matter what I did. I don't know and I have no way of finding out.

And then the last self-fulfilling prophecy I had is a recurring one. It is deeply rooted in my insecurities and trauma response. Yet despite knowing all these things, the future that I have watched in my mind over and over played out right before my eyes.

I don't even have any energy to use for crying anymore. Because at the core of it all, I know that it was my actions that brought me in this situation.

Maybe if I had taken a different action at some of the things that take place then it would not have happened. But hindsight is useless in the grand scheme of things

What does it matter now that I know it is all on me when everything is said and done?

I honestly don't know why I wrote this article. Maybe I just needed to find a way to feel more like myself in the chaos I am feeling. Maybe I wanted to share it so others won't have to do the same self-destructive things I do.

The truth is I feel so caught up in who everyone expects me to be and who I truly am. In the time I spent filling the shoes of other's expectations of me, the one I truly am has faded in the farthest corner of myself. It's funny when I feel like an audience in my own life. I watch myself ruin things that I value and then be stubborn about admitting it.

However, even in this messy state, I know that I do not want to continue being selfish