The "Art" of Writing About Hot Girls in Yoga Pants
I am a contract writer for a media company, and almost every day they post assignments on their bulletin board that are for the taking. They are mainly clickbait type of material, articles that are not based on solid facts, but just clickable stories (things like the benefits of coconut oil, the biggest celebrity houses, the worst celebrity haircuts to date). I don’t really care. I guess there is a part of my that does not like perpetuating nonsense, cluttering the internet with semi true to false to completely unimportant articles, but I have to get paid somehow, because so far, poetry and even my other serious writing hasn’t paid much of the bills.
Instagram: sexygirls.xo
Yesterday, there was a higher paying article available about yoga pants. Well, it wasn’t really about yoga pants so much as making an image-based list of girls looking hot in yoga pants. Normally, this is not the type of article I pick up, but it seemed easy enough. And it was. The hardest part was accurately crediting where the pics came from, because often times Instagram pics tagged something like hotyogaass are from an alternate source, not the original chica that posted it, and if I can find the original source, I must.
Actually, I’m going to take that back. The hardest part was writing 50 word blurbs for each picture. I don’t want to sound elitist or above anything, but I have never had to dumb down my writing (and thus my mind while writing it) as much as I had to for this article. How many different ways can a person say something about how hot a girl with a poppin’ booty looks in her yoga pants? There was some creativity involved in looking for various ways to essentially say the same thing, or looking for something new to say in a photo that is void of anything but hot yoga ass, but pretty much, afterward, I felt like my mind was a jiggling slab of jello, nothing like any of the asses I was seeing, that's for sure.
Instagram: sommerray
Instagram: alexastancofit
What does that mean for me exactly? Are some people better at dumbing down their mind and their writing for the masses? For instance, take someone like Margaret Atwood, in my opinion a brilliant literary writer whose novels are masterpieces. Then take Dan Brown. I’m sure everyone knows who he is, but in my opinion, his writing is not good. His stories are good, but the writing and the ideas are not philosophical in any way, and they don’t cause a person to see the world in a new and interesting way. His books are entirely plot-based, with little to no character development. They’re like watching a shallow action movie. There is obviously a place in the world for this, and the fact that these types of books are easy to read does not make them bad simply for the easiness. I guess what I am saying is that I wonder if Dan Brown is actually a literary writer at heart who changed his methods in order to make money, and if so, did he stop writing his real stuff because it just takes up all his time and energy to write the other stuff and the rest of the time he just wants to chill? These are the questions I ask myself when I write the clickbait articles, making sure not to use words that are too big or phrasing that is not ridiculously simple.
It also occurred to me to be bothered by the fact that mindlessly scrolling through photos of girls in yoga pants, as the title promised, could get a person through the day, but I try not to judge. There is some artful aesthetic in the female form, after all, and it isn’t for me to say that the people looking at the photos will be objectifying the women so much as admiring their lovely shape and the way it makes them feel. Still, I wondered, and am still wondering, why were my 50 word blurbs after each photo necessary? Is anyone actually going to read them? That’s not really the point, is it? It would have been another matter if the job was to critically analyze the composition of the photos, or even comment on their artful craftsmanship both by model and photographer, but that wasn’t the game I was playing either.
I will say that in scrolling through Instagram looking for the perfect booties in yoga pants, I saw a whole lot of excellent yoga Instagram accounts. Still, many of the best yogis out there don’t have the kind of ass this website was looking for. This one did, but this was the only one I really found:
Instagram: yogainspiration
The majority of yogis I saw (at least the ones posting) tended to have tight but tiny butts. For instance:
Instagram: maritjolien
I was also pleasantly surprised by the amount of overweight women posting their yoga routines. I hate that the media makes fat people feel bad about their bodies so much that they are ashamed to post their lives just like everyone else, so it was positive for me to see that that might be changing, at least a little bit.
Instagram: queencurvyelyse
In the end, writing these kind of clickbait articles for a living, it really just has to be the way it is for now. I need the money, and a temporary jello state of mind is ok, because my normal writer’s brain kicks back in eventually. At least this time, I got some cool yoga art to look at in the process :)
My brain smooshed "yoga" and "art" into yogurt in the last sentence and though I missed something haha.
Even if you didn't curate these posts into a single article, the target audience would still be crawling for those pictures anyway. Glad that you were able to enjoy the beauty of women working to improve themselves. I got some booty work inspiration from this too!
You're absolutely right about the fact that the people seeking out that material will surely find it. And, yeah, I always try to find something positive, even from something I find a bit negative. It seems to always be there. Just takes some creative looking.
Absolutely, we are the only ones responsible for how external things make us feel. You're growing stronger in every instance you strive to find the benefit. In the meantime, take the yoga-butt-lovers money and use it to fund what DOES appropriately challenge your creativity and mind :)
It's unfortunate that 'hot women in yoga pants' totally works as clickbait - I sometimes find myself mindlessly clicking on these kind of brain junk food and when I realize what I'm doing snap out of it like a dream.
What I like about steemit is that you can choose what you want to write, as a freelance writer I've had to write a lot of trash in the past to pay the bills. This website is a welcome relief.
That is true about Steemit. I am super happy to have found this community, especially when I find the kind of writing I really enjoy reading--personal narratives :)
completely agree with you...
it is what it is though, I suppose. We have to work within the system.
Hello @jessandthesea It is hard to work something that you love to do and to pay your bills. In every country same thing. But, as you said you must find something between love and bill work. But, I like this photos that you posted here. :) Best from Serbia
Thank you! I will keep on keeping on!
Hi! Great post! I do yoga too and I use those pants hahahaha I would like too see more post like this... Keep going! kisses!
Hey, thanks! Posts about what exactly? My inner thoughts about the writing process when working for money?
What a great read! I, myself, am guilty of posting yoga selfies and analyzing how my body looks before being willing to post. It always feels like a balance of wanting to share my yoga practice (mostly in nature) without trying not to be too flashy, but also secretly hoping that my tummy looks flat and my ass looks good.
It's just part of our culture to post the most flattering pics of ourselves. I think we are all culprits. However, I think it is also super important to accept yourself for who you really are, not just the person who sucked it in for the photo. I try to remember this, when I look in the mirror and don't LOVE what I see. The people I love the most, it is not for how they look. It is how they are inside which reflects onto who they are outside. <3
If Pascal had needed to write about hot girls in yoga pants, I'm pretty sure he would have written something like this afterwards.
I know that a lot of guides for beginning writers explicitly recommend dumbing down your writing to an inane level--or at least, I've encountered many that do. I imagine, though, that it isn't so much that people with literary styles dumb them down, so much as people with Dan Brownish styles succeed more.
Wow, what a compliment comparing me to Pascal <3
I've been writing for a long time, and only in journalism courses was I told to "dumb it down," and that is including two solid years of grad work in an MFA Writing program. That being said, when it comes to making money, the masses do have to be considered. And it is not to say that I am trying to hold myself above them because I am more literate, only that if I want to reach people, which I do, I have to bring things to a level that more can understand, more meaning those who have not studied literature and writing extensively. That yoga booty article though, haha, man, that takes the cake on my dumbed down writing.
Haha you are totally right, but still I believe that the internet is somehow the primary entertainment channel for a lot of people, it is hard to believe that Tv, journalism, internet or any other communication channel could be 100% cultural or ethic. Because in the end all this channels are a reflection of the mass media society, so, in the end, the poor minded people still need their entertainment and their pictures of girls in Yoga pants .. haha but i know your writing and it is sad to see that a beautiful mind as yours need to write about that because people just don’t care...
great article ! Love it (:
thank you. I actually wrote another one today, this time the girls actually had to be in yoga poses, but it was still about their bodies. maybe it was worse writing this one actually, haha.
As this is a writing website i thought you might be interested to know that a yogi is the male version of the neutral yogin and yogini is the female version.
thanks for sharing :). in casual writing, and in part because it doesn't genderize an unnecessarily gendered word, I like to stick with yogi for both. back in the day, female poets used to be called poetess, but that for some reason died. I like it when unnecessarily gendered words die, because it signifies, I think, a positive sign for equality somehow.