It Takes Kindness: Inspiration for January

Heeeey y'all! This is ya girl @thegaillery and she has risen from her blogging hiatus. Shoutout to mah women Anne and Rox, this momma has written! Get it? Get it?

These past few days, thoughts of stopping this Inspiration Series crossed my mind. I wasn't prompt in delivering content anymore because life happened, schedules aren't in writing's favor and to be honest, I wasn't even sure if I was still the right person to deliver positivity on this side of the web anymore.

It wasn't until one of my baby girls opened up to me and said that she has bookmarked all of my inspiration posts. She swore that she has read every single one of them (yes this is you bb Therienze) that I began to see this as a duty. As your unofficial big sister on this side of the web, I take it upon myself to give you another webpage to bookmark. You can count on that.

My last post talked about being a bitch in this day and age. Let's balance the 'tude of that post with the delicateness of this one - "It Takes Kindness." This title is actually from my CBTL Journal's Theme for February. It has been a recurring theme in my life as well. Let's get to them!

A friend asked me the other day, "Why do people women join pageants?" And to that I told her, "I asked myself the same question days before you did. To be honest, I join because I get something out of it - confidence and an expanded network." This question stayed in my head for a long while and thinking about it took me back to Sushmita Sen's answer to the 1997 Miss Universe Question, "What is the essence of being a woman?"

Just being a woman is God’s gift. The origin of a child is a mother, a woman. She shows a man what sharing, caring, and loving is all about. That is the essence of a woman.

• Sushmita Sen

While we can argue that a woman is far more than her softer passions, it can't be denied that a woman represents the human person's softer passions - love, compassion and kindness among others. I'm also not saying that only women can exemplify these, men are capable of these soft passions too!

And then I got into more thinking... we need women of great influence to promote the softer passions because it goes around. If we teach people kindness, kindness tends to get passed on. More kindness for everybody!

Being in the corporate world has a lot of challenges for me as a woman. One of which is the tendency of others to uphold the harder passions of assertiveness, competitiveness and power. But it is worthy to note that amid the rewards these harder passions get, the softer passions of kindness, generosity and patience made me survive.

Had I not known kindness in the persons of my friends at work, I wouldn't last until now. Thank you, friends.

This may seem counterintuitive, but this works! My friend, Anne, recalled an instance when she saw a person she wasn't in good terms with. Expectedly, this person didn't see her in the eye. Instead of following his example, she greeted the person with her loudest "Hi!" and the person inevitably replied with his greeting too. These days, channeling the maturity needed to do this has become a great challenge. But hey, I get better everyday!



A word of warning, though. There is such a thing as too much kindness. It is human nature to take advantage of one's vulnerability. Be intelligently kind. Leave something for yourself. We can be angels, but we can't all be martyrs.


And the best...

This, for me, is the hardest because I tend to get too hard on myself. I can't help it, it's just how I do things. However, I try to reason with myself and say... if I can be kind to other people, I should be a lot kinder to myself. How can I give kindness when I have no capacity to be kind to myself first?


There you have it, bbs. Thanks for reading all the way through!


Your kind B,
@thegaillery

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