I feel like I have things pretty under control for my youngest except when my daughter wants to start with him and then when I really get upset she gets mad at me and tells me to beat his butt that would cure/fix him and I do try and explain to her that will not help. That it will make the problem worse because he isn't being bad just to be bad. I am not sure if she does this to get attention or if she is truly that bored she had to interact in such ways.

This is one of the more difficult things to deal with. People get frustrated with our kids because of their inability to conform to what is socially acceptable, then blame us for not dealing with it properly.

It's especially hard when it's family telling us we're doing things wrong. You would think they'd know better since they're aware of more history than strangers.

We should try to remember that they're frustrated. They're trying to solve the problem. In many situations, they're even trying to be helpful. They think we just need to approach the situation better. I don't blame them for being frustrated.

It can also boil down to immaturity on their part. It's all part of the package.

On some level, our frustrated family members do understand that there's no way to discipline away autism. I think it's a good to reassure them that we are frustrated too. We're all in the same boat.