I have 3 children. I have a 19 year old son, 14 year old daughter and a 8 year old son. My youngest has Aspergers' Syndrome and we started noticing it when he was about 3 years old tho it took a lot longer to get a proper diagnosis. My daughter likes to instigate and causes my youngest to become upset because she finds it funny but reality she's only causing me problems because I am ultimately who had to deal with my youngest meltdowns and fits of rage. My youngest was very slow/late to try and talk and form sentences and that was justified as normal for a child that's high spectrum Aspergers. He actually could say larger words would leave out the smaller words like a sentence "I would like to go outside" turned into either "outside" or to "go outside!!" but in a stressed manor because at first we wasn't totally understanding him until we figured out his way of speech. As my youngest has gotten older he's gotten better at trying to talk and hold conversation but it always doesn't come out right the things he's trying to say and because of that he gets upset and shows fits of anger because he thinks he's being made fun of because of stuff my daughter does when she is instigating him. Also my son has a fascination with numbers and appears to do better with them than actual letters/words. He can memorize numbers to the point of you have to make sure he hasn't seen your debit/credit cards because he remembers the numbers and can use them at will also passwords hes good at those too. Then there is video games and he is actually trying to script/program things in Minecraft and he found this on his own. Oh yeah I also come from a information systems background.

I feel like I have things pretty under control for my youngest except when my daughter wants to start with him and then when I really get upset she gets mad at me and tells me to beat his butt that would cure/fix him and I do try and explain to her that will not help. That it will make the problem worse because he isn't being bad just to be bad. I am not sure if she does this to get attention or if she is truly that bored she had to interact in such ways.

Thanks for sharing this post and I'll certainly check out chainbb.com finding other people who deal with the same things as I do is really helpful as I've found most doesn't understand what the issue is... or if someone has had prior experience with a similar situation will come on too strong or that they know more than I do about my kid. It also makes for awkwardness when around people who think they know everything about autism. Again thanks for this post and sorry I got a bit long winded here...