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RE: I want to write... but I'm too disgusted with myself to begin...
Very true. This was one of the few times I put something out like this. More of an act of desperation from a very, very bad day :P I'm generally too fried mentally and emotionally by the time everyone else is in bed to write anything coherent and that's my only time available and I hate waking up early.
Even breaking the routine is a challenge because 'why should I have the right to do anything fun when all I do is sit around all day'? Or at least that's what I tell myself, or imagine my wife saying.