The Inner Triangle
You are like a three-storeyed building. The first floor is that of the child, the second floor is that of the parent, the third floor is that of the adult. All three exist together in you, says OSHO
Transactional Analysis has the triangle of PAC. P means parent, A means adult, C means child. These are your three layers, as if you are a three-storeyed building. The first floor is that of the child, the second floor is that of the parent, the third floor is that of the adult. All three exist together. This is your inner triangle and conflict. Your child says one thing, your parent says something else, your adult, rational mind says something else. The child says ‘enjoy’. For the child, this moment is the only moment; he has no other considerations. The child is spontaneous, but unaware of the consequences — unaware of past, unaware of future. He lives in the moment. He has no values and he has no mindfulness, no awareness. The child consists of felt concepts; he lives through feeling. His whole being is irrational. Of course, he comes into many conflicts with others. He comes into many contradictions within himself, because one feeling helps him to do one thing, then suddenly he starts feeling another feeling. He starts many things but never comes to any conclusion. He enjoys — but his enjoyment is not creative, cannot be creative. He delights — but life cannot be lived only through delight.
You cannot remain a child forever. You will have to learn many things because you are not alone here....The child has to be disciplined — and that’s where the parent comes in. The parental voice in you is the voice of the society, culture, civilisation; the voice that makes you capable of living in a world where you are not alone —where there are many individuals with conflicting ambitions, where there is much struggle for survival, where there is much conflict. You have to pave your path, and you have to move very cautiously. The parental voice is that of caution. It makes you civilised.The word ‘civil’ is good. It means one who has become capable of living in a city, who has become capable of being a member of a group, of a society. The parental voice gives you commandments — what to do, what not to do. The feeling simply goes blind. The parent makes you cautious. It is needed. And then there is the third voice within you, the third layer, when you have become adult and you are no longer controlled by your parents; your own reason has come of age, you can think on your own. The child consists of felt concepts; the parent consists of taught concepts, and the adult consists of thought concepts. And these three layers are continuously fighting. The child says one thing, the parent says just the opposite, and the reason may say something totally different. There is no necessity that your adult mind agrees with your parents. Your parents were not omniscient, they were not allknowing. They were as much fallible human beings as you are, and many times you find loopholes in their thinking.
Many times you find them very dogmatic, superstitious, believing in foolish things, irrational ideologies. Your parent says do it, your adult says it is not worth doing, and your child goes on pulling you somewhere else.This is the triangle within you. If you listen to the child, your parent feels angry. So one part feels good — you can go on eating as much ice cream as you want — but your parent inside feels angry. A part of you starts condemning and then you start feeling guilty. The same guilt arises as it used to arise when you were really a child.You are no longer a child — but the child has not disappeared. It is there; it is just your foundation. And it is almost impossible to find something on which all these three layers agree. These are all reactions and any reaction is bound to be partial. Only response is total, and whatsoever is partial is a mistake.That’s the definition of error: whatsoever is partial is a mistake. So whenever there is a need to respond, the first thing is, become mindful, become aware. Remember your centre. Become grounded in your centre. Then out of this centring let the act arise — and whatsoever you do will be virtuous, whatsoever you do will be right. Abridged from Finding Your Own Way, Osho Times International Foundation, www.osho.com