What Should a Christian Pray for or not Pray for?

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In prayer, we can praise God, thank God and make requests of God. Is it okay to ask God to improve our heath or to provide us with a car so we can get to work? Or are we only to make spiritual requests, like asking God to help us to develop patience, overcome jealously or have the right words to provide comfort for one who is grieving? A careful study of the scriptures helps to lay out Biblical guidelines for what we should and should not pray for.

(1) Pray for your Enemies - Matt 5:44, Luke 6:28

It would be natural to want God punish or destroy our enemies, but Jesus admonishes us to pray for our enemies. He says, “… love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. (Luke 6:27, 28 NASV)

This attitude is very opposite of our natural human thinking. Jesus said, “If you do good to those who do good to you, what credit is that to you? For even sinners do the same… Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.” (Luke 6:33,36 NASV).

How can we pray for our enemies? Well, we can pray for their deliverance from the snares and delusions of Satan and the blindness which hinders them from discerning the beauty of holiness. Yet such a prayer must be done with the greatest of humility, lest we be overcome with the pride of the Pharisee’s (Luke 18:9-14). Samuel sets an example for use by praying for the unfaithful nation of Israel who were asking for a King in place of their true king, Jehovah. Yet even so, Samuel said, "God forbid that I should sin against the Lord in ceasing to pray for you." (1 Sam. 12:23)

(2) Pray for the Harvest Work - Matt. 9:37-38, Luke 10:2

“Then He [Jesus] said to His disciples, "The harvest truly is plentiful, but the laborers are few. "Therefore pray the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into His harvest."” (Mt 9:37-38 NKJV)

As Lord of the harvest, Jesus wanted his disciple’s minds, hearts and efforts focused on His work. Can our prayers not accompanied by efforts really be sincere? In truth, those who are most earnestly praying and sympathetic are those who are most earnestly laboring in the harvest work. Paul said, “Every one who serves as a soldier keeps himself from becoming entangled in the world’s business—so that he may satisfy the officer who enlisted him.” (2Ti 2:4 Weymouth)

Notice Jesus heart attitude in the Jewish Harvest work of sharing the gospel with unbelievers. “But when He saw the multitudes, He was moved with compassion for them, because they were weary and scattered, like sheep having no shepherd.” (Mt 9:36 NKJV) Jesus attitude was not harsh and condemning of those who were lost. Sadly, some Christians preach their Gospel with an attitude of pride and condemnation toward unbelievers. Like our Master, as we pray for the Harvest work, let us be moved with compassion for the blind and suffering masses.

(3) Pray for the Brethren – James 5:14-18

“14 Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. 15 And the prayer of faith will save the sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. 16 Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much. 17 Elijah was a man with a nature like ours, and he prayed earnestly that it would not rain; and it did not rain on the land for three years and six months. 18 And he prayed again, and the heaven gave rain, and the earth produced its fruit.” (James 5:14-18 NKJV)

James here says, “the prayer of faith will save the sick.” Some have made the mistake of thinking that James is talking about physical healing. The word “sick” (from Strongs 770) can refer to either physical or spiritual sickness depending upon the context. The same word is found in 1 Corinthians. 8:12 - “weak conscience” and in Romans 14:1- “weak in the faith.” Similarly, verse 15 says, “And the prayer of faith will save the sick.” The word sick from Strongs 2577 can mean “weary” or “tired,” as it is used in Hebrews 12:3, which says, “lest you become weary and discouraged in your souls.”

Contextually, James establishes that he is speaking about spiritual sickness when he says, “And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. Confess your trespasses to one another…” Yet, ordinarily, there would be no need for an individual to confess his trespasses to anyone, unless it is to the person whom he had trespassed against (Matt 18:15; Luke 17:3). Otherwise our sins need only be confessed to the Lord (1 John 1:9), except if the sin is of such a sever nature as to break fellowship with the Lord (Matt 18:15-17; Jas 5:19-20)

The sin-sick one should realize his need, call upon the Church elders and confess his fault. The elder’s prayers should not be for the removal of the trial or discipline, but rather that the intended lesson has been learned from the experience (Heb 12:5-13). The elders prayers should be for the forgiveness of the sins (vs 15) and development of the Gal 5:22-23 “fruits of the spirit,” by "anointing him with oil" – vs 14 (the influence of the Holy Spirit. See 2 Cor 1:21-22 & 1 John 2:27). Paul teaches, “11 Now no chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless, afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.” (Hebrews 12:13 NKJV).

It is essential that the elders approach this spiritual healing effort with love and humility, lest they be caught up with feelings of pride, judgment and superiority, perhaps then doing more harm than good. (Gal 6:1-3) Our prayers and words of encouragement to righteousness will have the effect of raising up, stimulating and reviving the spiritually weary and fainting one. The Lord has put a special responsibility upon each New Creature with love and care to look out for all other members. (1 Cor 12:25-26; Eph 4:15-16; 1 John 3:14-16)

(4) Pray for the Holy Spirit – Luke 11:13

“If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him!” (Lu 11:13 NKJV)

In verse 11 Jesus asks, “If a son asks for bread from any father among you, will he give him a stone?” Just as any loving parent is anxious to give their child the fleshly nourishment necessary to sustain earthly life, so our heavenly Father is anxious to provide us with the spiritual nourishment necessary to sustain our spiritual life.

It is prudent for the New Creature to regularly ask I prayer for more of the Holy Spirit, lest, like the foolish virgins, we too late find that our flasks are out of oil - the Holy Spirit (Matt 25:3). The advice of the wise virgins (Matt 25:8-9) was to go to the market place (of experiences) to purchase more oil (guidance of Holy Spirit in experiences). Since the wise virgins had been doing this all along, they had sufficient oil (Holy Spirit) with them (Rom 8:9; Gal 5:16, 25; Eph 3:16-19; 5:18).

If we merely pray for the Spirit, but do not follow up with the action of studying the Truth and serving the Lord and His people, we will continue to be at most only "babes in Christ." We are admonished not to quench (1 Thess 5:19) or grieve (Eph 4:30) the Holy Spirit. This light can be extinguished by: the spirit of worldliness; selfishness or thoughtlessness; indulging in the pleasures of the flesh; weariness in well doing; or it may be permitted to die out for want of replenishing.

(5) Pray in Secret – Matt. 6:6

Jesus exposes the hypocrisy of those who publicly draw attention to their good deeds and prayers (Matt 6:5). If at our meetings together we want to give a long, colorful and poetic prayer to impress others, we are just feeding our own ego.

Jesus’ usual method of prayer was to go to the Father privately (Mark 1:35; Luke 5:16). He said, “But you, when you pray, go into your room, and when you have shut your door, pray to your Father who is in the secret place; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you openly.” (Mt 6:6 NKJV) In our mind, we can privately "pray without ceasing" (1 Thessalonians 5:17) throughout the day as we seek God's guidance in our behavior. Nehemiah, in his mind, secretly prayed to God for help while he is standing before the king (Nehemiah 2:4).

Jesus also prayed publically to the Father, as when he raised Lazarus from the dead. His purpose was so that the people would know that God had sent Him. (John 11:41-42) Daniel also publically prayed visibly for all to see (Dan 6:10), in spite of the new law that would condemn him to death. His motive evidently was to set an example of courage and faithfulness to God for the Jewish People.

(6) Pray for Deliverance – Matt 6:13
“…deliver us from evil…” (Matt 6:13 NKJV)

Jesus taught us to pray, asking God to deliver us from evil. It is natural to want God to protect us from health problems, financial distress, violent criminals, etc. Jesus promised that the very hairs on our head are numbered (Luke 12:7). David spoke of the protection God’s children can rely on. “You are my hiding place; You shall preserve me from trouble; You shall surround me with songs of deliverance” (Psalm 32:7). Jesus had heavenly armies at his disposal. He said, “Or do you think that I cannot now pray to My Father, and He will provide Me with more than twelve legions of angels?” (Mt 26:53 NKJV)

However, for the New Creature, the greatest dangers are the spiritual threats. Satan is our great Adversary; so we must be on the alert to resist him, and yet realize our own insufficiency and need of divine aid. Paul admonishes us, “Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.” (Eph 6:11, 12 NKJV)

The Christian armor is the spiritual defense God has provided us to battle these invisible forces. This armor includes the shield of faith, helmet of the hope of salvation, breastplate of righteousness, sword of the spirit (truth), sandals of the Gospel of peace and our loins girded with a consecration to the service of the Truth. (see Eph 6-13-17)

(7) Pray for Forgiveness – Luke 11:14

Jesus taught us to pray, “Forgive us our sins.” (Luke 11:14) He also said, “And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses. But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses.” (Mr 11:25-26 NKJV)

We would be in a sad spiritual state if we were to ask God to forgive us, while at the same time we were not willing to forgive others. Jesus said that, “Only the merciful shall obtain mercy” (Matt. 5:7). He spoke a parable of the unmerciful servant who had been forgiven much debt, but then would not forgive a much lessor debt from a fellow servant. (Matt. 18:21-35). Like the unmerciful servant, if we are harsh, unsympathetic, unforgiving toward our brethren, the heavenly Father will so deal with us and not forgive us our trespasses.

We would also be in a sad spiritual state if pride caused us to not ask God to forgive us, because we were blind to our own failings. (1 John 1:8) We need to ask ourselves if we are aware of our sins and whether we are we looking to Jesus for help in overcoming those weaknesses. John said, “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (1Jo 1:9 NKJV)

We may not forgive others in the absolute sense until they ask us for forgiveness, yet we should be always in a forgiving attitude. True forgiveness will not continue to harbor feelings of anger, bitterness and resentment, but rather, love, sympathy and forgiveness for the faults of others.

In Acts 8, Simon offered the Apostles money for their ability to give the Holy Spirit by the laying on of their hands. Peter said, “I see a man bitter with jealousy and bound with his own sin.” (Acts 8:23 Phillips). He gave Simon a solution. In verse 22 Phillips, he said, “All you can do now is to repent of this wickedness of yours and pray earnestly to the Lord that if possible the evil intention of your heart may be forgiven.” Peter was not uncharitable; he kindly urged the sinner to repentance. He at least saved the church of Samaria from the imposition of one whom otherwise they would have esteemed as a brother.

Final Thoughts on what to Pray for

Pray for Wisdom: (Jas 1:5) “5 If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally...” (Jas 1:5 NKJV). God was very pleased when Solomon asked for wisdom (1 Kings 3:9, 10) and thankfully we have the book of Proverbs from Solomon, which a book of practical and daily wisdom.

Ask in Faith (Jas 1:6-7) "6 But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind. 7 For let not that man suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord;” (Jas 1:6-7 NKJV, see also Mt 21:22) If we won't believe in God, he won't believe in us. If will be like our prayers are falling on deaf earths. "Without faith, it is impossible to please God." (Heb 11:16 NKJV)

Ask for what you NEED (Matt 6:8) Jesus said, “For your Father knows the things you have need of before you ask Him.” (Matthew 6:8 NKJV). Jesus is assuring us that the Father knows what we need before we ask, but He is not telling us that we should not ask. As a matter of fact, he tells us to ask, "Give us this day our daily bread" (Matthew 6:11 NKJV). In Matt 6:25-33, Jesus tells us not to have anxiety about what we shall eat, drink or wear, because our heavenly Father will provide all these things. We can pray with faith for needs (not wants), knowing He will provide it (Philippians 4:6). Just don't expect a gourmet meal and designer jeans.

Don't ask for Physical wants (Jas 4:3). God is not a cosmic Santa Clause ready to give us whatever we ask for. He promises He will provide our physical needs, not our physical want list. James warns, “You ask and do not receive, because you ask amiss, that you may spend it on your pleasures.” (Jas 4:3 NKJV).

Make Spiritual Requests (1 John 5:14) We have seen that is is appropriate to make spiritual requests from God, like asking for wisdom (James 1:5), the Holy Spirit (Luke 11:3) and the brethren (James 5:14-18). John says, “... if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us.” (1John 5:14 NKJV). So the key is, we shouldn't be asking God, what we want for ourselves, but rather we should be asking God, for what we have learned from the Bible, that He wants for us.
Conclusion:
Paul said, “7 And lest I should be exalted above measure by the abundance of the revelations, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I be exalted above measure. 8 Concerning this thing I pleaded with the Lord three times that it might depart from me. 9 And He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness." Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10 Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ's sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” (2 Corinthians 12:7-10 NKJV)
Paul pleaded with God three times to have a physical infirmity removed but God did not grant his request. God said, "My grace is sufficient." So Paul's strength was made perfect in his weakness. In other words this infirmity helped prevent pride from taking root in his heart and instead he embraced his adversities to grow his Christian character. It wasn't wrong for Paul to ask God to remove a physical infirmity, as Paul may have felt he could serve the Lord better without this liability. Paul graciously accepted God's will.
As long as we make our requests to God with "if it be your will," it's okay to ask. If we are thinking wrong, the Lord will correct us and not give us what we think we need. However, Jesus does say, "ask and you will receive." So why not ask? With our own children, don't we like to wait for them to ask for something first, so that they hopefully appreciate it more and remember where it's coming from. The Heavenly Father doesn't want us to take Him for granted. God wants us to acknowledge our needs to Him, and that He is the source of our blessings, temporal and spiritual.