Just really keep coming back to this. I think this is wonderful for you. I really resonate w the frustration and gloom. Im learning so much by having to deal w pain, and really wtf are you gonna do? The way i see it is just giving our best and doing whatever we can think of to help. Allowing the pain to flow through you. To not buy into the sob stories. To not dwell in the past and to press on even if that means pain and death. Like arent we already doing that. Sometimes we may be overtaken w pain and mind attacks but we just need to let that flow through us as well. Im finding practical value from adding some humor w positive beliefs attitudes and empowerment. Also the wim hof can be demenstrated in labs to be very powerful. I have experienced it myself but havent touched the full extent what is possible w his methods. Follow your joy and practically manage the pain as best as possible, while also allowing the fuck this shit attitude to flow through you. Healing is possible and even if thats not our fate at least we can dance to the best of our abilities. Im finding much joy in the present moment and also lil things like a butterfly flying :). Anything is possible. Just sharing a few thoughts and majorly cheering you on. X