My Personal Demons: How Coming Back From The Abyss Helped Me To Fully Embrace STEEM For The Sake Of Humanity And The Need For Hope

in #steem7 years ago (edited)

We all have our own personal trials and tribulations. There are many things each of us encounter throughout life which cause pain. What I am writing here is not to make my plight seem any worse than anyone else. Instead, I simply hope to convey to all of you how certain things shaped my thinking. I realize there are many out there who did and still are suffering more than I can ever know.

My story is one of addiction, specifically to alcohol. It is 20 years since I took a drink which only came through the assistance of a 12-step program. I can tell you that I had basically 30+ years of struggle both with drinking and without. I wish I could share a story of ease and luxury yet that isn't my deal.

One of the reason I am totally passionate about Steemit and the entire STEEM ecosystem is because I see it as providing hope to millions (if not billions) of people. To me, hope is a necessity in life, the same as oxygen. Without hope, there is little forward progress. On this matter, I speak from personal experience. I lived for a long time without any hope. Each day was a daily battle against a demon that was much stronger than myself. Over the course of a decade, we went toe-to-toe only to see me on the losing end. The situation was akin to sending a 10 year old into the ring against a prize fighter. The outcome was obvious.

Nevertheless, I kept showing up believing in my delusional mind that this time things would be different. Sadly, they never were. Over time, that created a downward spiral from which there appeared to be no stopping. Like a piece of metal drawn to a magnet, I was pulled in on a daily basis. No matter what I tried, there was no changing this. Each day was mostly a repeat from the day before. As the years passed, the rest of the world became distant to me. Even though I was still operating in it on a daily basis, it was increasingly foreign. People were progressing in life like most do. I, on the other hand, was spinning out of control.

As you can imagine, such a mental state eventually takes it toll. Inertia became a constant companion as did fear. And no, I am not talking about the fear like "the boss isnt going to like my project" fear. The kind I am referring to is terror. It gets to the point where picking up the phone was a chore (at that time we used answering machines...now I am carbon dating myself). Eventually, everyone either leaves or flees for dear life.

Ultimately, this leads to the only outcome one can envision. The pain is so great that one needs to escape it. What use to work as an reprieve, not longer provides that. Being totally inebriated yet still having battling the demons gets exhausting. Deep down, the outcome is known yet that delusion still exists. When that goes, one is forced to embrace the one logical thought there is: suicide.

That my friends is where hopelessness take people.

Without hope, there is no prospect of life. One is simply existing; trying to survive. Each day is a battle of epic proportions, of which, the individual knows will be lost. Sure there might be a minor victory or two in there. But, in the end, defeat is imminent.

Since I am writing these words, it is easy to guess that I found another way out of the situation other than suicide. I was lucky enough to find the help I needed in a 12 step program. For those who are aware of them, it is a concept of unity and unconditional caring. We are aware of the fact that we cannot succeed on our own. We require others. Since this is life or death, you could say we are dependent upon others to remain alive. As scary as that is, it is far more appealing than the state of mind from which I came.

While not perfect, in fact, completely flawed, this organization has helped millions who were in the same situation I was. Greed, selfishness, and personal interest are forced to take a back seat. If one insists on presenting those, he or she runs the risk of making a fatal mistake. Such is the situation when you are dealing with something that is life or death.

Over the past 2 decades, I am conditioned with the understanding of how a different way exists than what is commonly espoused to people. I can see the devastation that comes from greed and selfishness. People are perfectly happy to get on their high horse so they can look down upon others. It is sad they cannot see the destruction their beliefs or actions cause. Many of us see the same thing on here among some people.

Now please do not misunderstand me. I am not saint. I have times where I am extremely selfish and my own self-interest takes priority. The ability to run roughshod over another still is ever-present within me. These are things I try to be mindful of when dealing with others. Sometimes I am extremely successful, other times I fail.

That said, I personally know the benefits and impact of having an organization that exist for the purpose of pulling people out of the abyss. While my demons were tied to alcohol, we have a bankster created system that has thrown most of humanity into the same hole. These people know, just like I do, what hopelessness is. They know what it is like to wake up every day understanding what is going to take place since it is a repeat from the day before. Survival is the sole goal, one that gets old very quickly. Yet if you were never at this point, it is hard to imagine.

In my writing on here, you know I support the basic income concept. In fact, I believe that tokens will end up being that solution for most. Nevertheless, I am astounded when people come out against it. I almost have to laugh when people take the approach that people are lazy and want a "free lunch", therefore they are against it. I guess it is easy to take that approach when one is sitting in a University classroom theorizing the ways of the world. Do you know I never heard of anyone from a third world country coming out against this concept. It is usually us elitists in the West who come up with these beliefs.

Understanding hopelessness personally does not afford me the luxury of drawing conclusions like that.

It is not laziness that is being witnessed, it is hopelessness.

"Pull yourself up by your bootstraps."

You try to do that with a 747 parked on your head. That is what it is like to get out from under a totally hopeless state. Whether that comes from addition, extreme poverty, or other debilitating circumstances, I can tell you the outcome is always the same: defeat.

Humanity is at a wonderful point at the moment. Billions of people are miserable and suffering. This creates an environment of desperation which is a sensational gift. While that sounds counter-intuitive, it is from this desperation that the rebuilding can take place. I experienced this personally and believe it applies to all of humanity. Over the next ten years, we simply need to provide people with some alternatives.

And one of those alternatives is STEEM.

This is a way out for millions of people who are experiencing the results of the bankster run world. The raping and pillaging that took place has left a fair portion of the world in a completely hopeless state. This has been going for so long that it has resulted in generational hopelessness. In other words, one is fucked from the day he or she is born. Just another generation screwed like the umpteen that went before. Of course, looking at wealth breakdown, we know this is spreading to the rest of the world including the Western nations which are supposed to be the model others followed. The banksters greed know no bounds.

One of the most basic premises of the steem blockchain is that an account is only filled by the upvotes of others. Sure one can upvote his or her own content but that typically wont get one far. It is the selflessness of others which enables us to get ahead on here. This is a completely non-bankster approach. It is for this reason that I believe STEEM can make that difference in the lives who have that hopelessness. It only requires the rest of us understanding that our actions are not about us but the ecosystem in general. With that mindset, millions will find that path out of the devastation they are currently residing in.

Some on here might read this and think it a bit dramatic and over the top. I am glad you have that luxury. Perhaps it might be beneficial to talk with those in Nigeria, Indonesia, or even Venezuela right now. Humanity cannot take the state of this world lightly. Blockchain is going to cause the greatest destruction to the establishment we have ever seen. I know enough about technology to understand whatever stands in its way will get flattened. Since the Internet decided to come to finance, the banksters are in its scope. The key to blockchain's effectiveness is decentralization. That is where the power comes from.

Just like the organization that saved my life, there is no one in charge. There is no point of attack to destroy it. Expansion is natural as more who are suffering are found. It is open to everyone who is willing to show up and put in some effort. If one wants to come on here and take, that is allowed but the results will be mixed at best. I have seen the power of a decentralized organization that is dependent upon its members helping others for survival. After 80+ years, it is not only going strong, it is still growing.

STEEM is like that too. While it is only a few years old. we are seeing incredible growth. There is a large portion of the user base who is selfless and giving. They understand that this is not about them and padding their own account with more STEEM. It is about participating in the development and growth of the ecosystem. They are well aware of the fact that the money will come. Again, the system is set up in a way that guarantees it will. Participate to even a fair degree and you cannot help but to get upvotes.

We all need to be grateful to Bitcoin for taking all the hits. The banksters and their propaganda arm, the media, bash that blockchain at every turn. It is the one on the tip of everyone's tongue. Day in and day out it takes a beating yet shows up again. All the while, STEEM is allowed to operate without much fanfare or recognition. This is to our advantage. With each passing day this blockchain, the apps on it, and the community get stronger. By the time they realize it is a threat, it will be too late.

To me, STEEM is at the head of the class of Cryptocurrency 2.0. While the Wall Street crowd buys up everything that isn't nailed down, STEEM is getting into the hands of regular people. We are starting to target the third class of crypto users. The first was the early adopters followed by the finance people. Next up is the average Joe/Jane who will never buy a crypto. However, since we are moving towards a tokenized world, one which obliterates the banksters stranglehold, this creates quite a dilemma.

STEEM is one of the answers to that dilemma. STEEM is for the everyman (everywomam).

Give us your poor, broken, uneducated, ugly, overlooked, unsuccessful, hopeless, abused, weird, outcast, lonely, scared, fragile, and desperate....and we will turn them into STEEMIANS.

Let's see Reddit and Facebook do that.

If you found this article helpful, please give it an upvote and a resteem.


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Agree with you on so many levels. <3 I commend you for staying on track and allowing yourself to have a different experience in life and not giving up on yourself.

I, too, see steemit as hopeful for humanity. I know for me and my partner on our homestead, it is already (1 month in) allowing us freedom to look at income and earnings on the homestead differently! Already opening my mind to bigger life possibilities. NEver have I found a website/blog with that potential. Many of us work hard here, and I trust it will be rewarded (it already is). Here, we have a chance.

NEver have I found a website/blog with that potential.

And I'd like to add that, being the introvert that I am in real life, steemit has given me not a new purpose with my writing, blogging and homestead but it has also given me all the community members from the homesteading group as well as many others that I consider friends now.

<3 <3 <3 glad you're here @goldendawne - you add SO MUCH!!

Thank you!! I truly enjoy being here and assisting!

Thanks for sharing your story. While you've had to endure some painful things in life, as we all do, your determination to overcome them serves as an inspiration to others. The great pitcher Dennis Eckersley is a recovering alcoholic. He said one day a fan came up to him and said that he'd been dry for a long period of time (I don't remember how long) and that the inspiration for quitting came from Eckersley, so he just wanted to shake his hand. Eckersley said that made his day.

Steem is good productive outlet that is worthy of our attention. Keeping our minds occupied helps us avoid doing things that are self-destructive. Kudos to you on your success.

Yes, we all have our own crosses to bear, and it up to us to overcome them, I still haven't overcomed mine, so I can't tell you for how "X" time I'm free from it, but I have hopes that slowly I'll manage to do it.

On the other hand, hearing you talking about years like that... I thought you were about my age dear mentor... but I see now, I'm just a kid!

No wonder you're so wise.
Cheers

What a truly honest and soul-filled post!

Inspiration and success can be found in so many shapes and forms; and this is a revealing unmasking of who you are.

I applaud your integrity for sharing with us.

Possibly your best post yet. 👍

Give us your poor, broken, uneducated, ugly, overlooked, unsuccessful, hopeless, abused, weird, outcast, lonely, scared, fragile, and desperate....and we will turn them into STEEMIANS.

Damn, I fit into way too many of those categories. 😏

Binge drank from 13 to 32 then my kidneys packed up. Scared me straight. Thanks for sharing greatly appreciated.Power to you.

It's amazing to see the wonders Steem has already done and the impact it has had around the world. However, that is merely the beginning as Steem and cryptocurrency are going to revolutionize the world. It's plain and simple for those who still deny the inconceivable truth they will be in awe. It's awesome to see you share your touching story and the battle you faced every day for many years. Keep up the fantastic content and always there is a community with you and behind you. Perhaps one day the United Nations could adopt the idea of a universal basic income and play a bigger role in the world. Although they have had many problems beforehand.

Crypto opens a lot of doors for people who otherwise would not be able to sustain a good life.

I believe I already told you about my country Venezuela... well for us, steemit is like something out of a dream. To be able to sustain our existence by engaging and creating content for this platform is like magic.

Thank you for sharing your personal story of battling addiction, we can all learn from you and from eachother. It seems to have made you a strong indivuidual who is giving back in a big way and looking to improve the world.

Sometimes the struggles and adversity we face only make us stronger. Right now we are under the bankster controlled government, we have been denied basic rights as humans in all areas of the world, and it has made us strong. We have survived, and now we are learning for ourselves how to thrive and respond to that adversity. We are learning to work together, to provide truth to eachother, and to find our balance in this world that continually tries to knock us down.

It's a beautiful thing to see the transition, thanks for sharing this story.